Adriana Grande Loves Her Ass

Before singing the National Anthem at the NFL’s season opener in Seattle, Adriana Grande posted some photos of her tight ass with the caption “Grande yet so petite.” It’s hard to brag about your own ass and not come off as a self involved twat. Grande proves this pretty solid rule of thumb. Rest assured we have all scoped it out and made our personal assessment. It has achieved something between “Not Bad” and inaudible remarks while jizzing in pants.

Ariana spent most of last week chiding people that the hacked photos of a red headed girl baring her ass were not her. It’s confusing in this day and age when a good percentage of your appeal as a music artist is defined entirely by your ass. Ass has replaced vocal chords, and perhaps even titties, as the primary critical success factor in a pop music career. You Tweet it, write songs about it, let rappers spank it, claim it, if Ariana could’ve farted the Star Spangled Banner out of her rectum, she wouldn’t have gone ass-first in Seattle. Then there’d be a huge controversy about her ass. And she’d be set for life.

Photo Credit: Instagram