Brooke Burke Deserves a Good Shvitz

I still like this Brooke Burke chick a lot. She’s birthed some Duggar family number of offspring without the need to brag about how many vegan dieting socially progressive kids she’s produced for this world. She also had cancer and instead of bitching about it on daytime TV, spent her time starting a lingerie line for hot moms to wear silky shit to try and make as many babies as she has. She probably shits pre-washed heirloom tomatoes to make the perfect Caprese salads for the homeless. Someday, all that nipping and tucking will make her look like a shrunken apple head, but the rising sea levels will be up to our ankles by then and we’ll all be dead or just very pissed about our wet shoes.

Photo Credit: AKM-GSI