Florida Lottery Winner Proves Karma Wrong

A 450 pound child molester and career criminal won a $3 million dollar scratch-off prize in Florida. This may be related to the logic tree that starts with if only convicts and drug addicts play scratchers, and only people who play scratchers can win the scratchers Super Millions prize… The local media reported Timothy Pool’s big fat state Lotto check and many people recognized him as the guy who had once stolen their car or their child’s virginity. Poole has been arrested 12 times and done two stints in the joint, which means he can no longer oversee his neighborhood patrol but is still issued a uni and gun. Some states have laws against registered sex offenders collecting on lotteries but Florida hasn’t really thought a lot of shit out. The media tried to contact Poole at his job and home as if it wasn’t obvious he is in Thailand making it rain and claiming he is in the WWE. God works in mysterious ways. A little bit too much so. Its starting to piss me off.

Photo Credit: Florida Lottery