Fifty year old Elle Macpherson did a photo shoot to promote Superelixer, a bullshit drink they sell at Whole Foods to women not nearly as hot as Elle Macpherson. I realized advertising was for stupid desperate people when I bought my first Jordans and promptly double dribbled and broke my ankle. Macpherson is the hottest fifty year old on record and when she passes away 200 years from now her body should be donated to science so lonely researchers can fuck her corpse and finally invent the cure for annoying. Or maybe displayed outside of a McDonald’s in the airport to shame people into getting their act together. Macpherson credits a proper diet and exercise along with her stupid drink for maintaining her looks. Also she’s clearly a cyborg who Phillip K Dick developed in his boink lab. Jesus would I love to talk Ed Sullivan with her over a boiling pot of kale. God bless you woman.