John Travolta True To The Cause

John Travolta says he doesn’t plan to see Going Clear, the documentary about Scientology which explains how it is a manipulative cult which participates in forced labor, extortion, tax evasion, and what are no doubt a shit load of super weird sober orgies. Gay John Travolta claims people really enjoy listening to his pompous self-help nonsense about an overlord named Xenu and doesn’t see the organization’s real estate holdings as relevant to his superpowers:

“I’ve helped so many people through hard times. Loss of children, loved ones, physical illnesses. Through many tough, tough life situations, I’ve used the technology to support them and help them. It always worked.”

The technology he is referring to is presumably an E-Meter which purports to read the mass of your thoughts then provides you the coordinates of a floating ship to which to send your life savings. Of course this is nonsensical but so is listening to Travolta while you stare at his hairline. Now if you’ve got film of the technology getting you hot cock, we can talk. It’s not for everyone, but I can see why you’re backing it.

Photo Credit: JohnTravolta.com