Hefner Outlived Playboy, Go Figure

The Wild West of the Internet died some time ago. Like all media channels the web has matured into giant corporate run stadium with overpriced bland concessions and family friendly sponsors riding funny cars. As men’s magazines face the digital frontier, it’s become super clear you can’t sell shit in America if you have tits in your content offering. Obscenely violent or idiotic or sub-par journalism or just plain old belching wheezing crap filled Jihadi text book pages are fine, but one nipple and you are sunk like every French ship ever in every war ever.

Playboy magazine announced they are eliminating naked women from their content as of March 2016. Not a small decision for a magazine based entirely around naked women. It’s like an NBA team announcing they’re going 62% white to look just like America. There will be repercussions. Like last place, forever. Playboy.com online has already gone tit-free and features tons of click bait articles on shit that you can find in any Buzzfeed leftovers and irregulars basement depot. It’s unclear who is going to read Playboy for just the articles, but if it means going out of business in three years instead of next week, you’ve got to pull the trigger. You hate to see the legacy of an elderly bisexual mansion rape purveyor tarnished in such a manner, but every business move has a price. In this case, no more tits. That’s steep.