Timebomb Kid Already Missed

It seems like just yesterday everybody spent eleven seconds before declaring that tinkering little rapscallion clock maker in Texas the Rosa Parks of fake time bomb looking surprise school science projects. About eleven seconds later everybody conceded that Ahmed Mohamed wasn’t so good at electronics but was pretty fair at manipulating a willing media and the political correct who get itchy when they fact check. Ahmed’s invite to the White House couldn’t be rescinded by the time his story started stinking because that would force the President to admit he maybe was rash. Next time take an entire hour before praising a kid whose family collected some serious fundraising booty on the back of a prank. The White House did the next best thing and invented an astronomy night, ordering up dozens of high school science nerds to blend in with Mohamed. Only this one picture exists of the entire evening. The rest were buried next to the Ark of the Convenant in the DoD warehouse.

Mohamed and his family ditched the Great Satan for Qatar shortly after the White House visit claiming the more accepting and liberal landscape of that human rights violating Sharia law nation. That cuddly little jihadi Doogie Howser will be missed. I’ll think of him every time somebody mentions how fucking stupid and naive our leaders have let themselves become. Daily. Seeing you effectively run ISIS someday will only make me more wistful, Ahmed.