Amy Winehouse’s Dad Rooted Against “Amy”

Mitch Winehouse is irked that the feature documentary about his daughter, Amy, won the Oscar. The Ukrainians who died during the making of Winter on Fire: Ukraine’s Fight for Freedom are also pissed. But they’re Ukrainians so they’re anger is misplaced and difficult to channel and ultimately they will be steamrolled by enemies from all directions. Disperse your blonde whores before it’s too late.

Winehouse’s father isn’t mad that a film highlighting his daughter’s out of control substance abuse is now going to get way more views than it was scheduled to ever receive. He’s angry because of how he is portrayed as an opportunistic stage dad in the film, claiming that his statements were heavily edited and taken out of context. I haven’t seen the movie because I’m not dating a millennial who only shops in vinyl record store. It’s possible to be a good dad and still have a daughter die from chronic drug abuse in her 20’s. It’s even more possible you did something horribly wrong. If you ask to have your test re-graded again by the teacher you might end up in jail. I’d sit tight on this one and subtly start taking credit for the Oscar.

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