Jessica Alba in A Bikini

The upside of being famous is moms across America will buy whatever shit you’re hawking because they wished they looked like you in a bikini and could fuck your hunky husband. The downside is you’ll get sued thrice as often. Jessica Alba’s organic diaper and Douglas fir leaf tampon company is being class action sued again because it’s laundry detergent maybe contains a chemical that will cause your baby to go fight for ISIS. The Wall Street Journal did a study on her detergent really just because Alba’s name pushes good traffic. WSJ claimed her Honest company soap contains SLS, which is apparently more dangerous than the processed sugar that just killed Phife Dawg. Alba claims it’s nonsense. They always order no SLS in their Chinese takeout delivery of detergent. Opportunistic attorneys don’t waste time on the details. Honest has been repeatedly sued because the company is always in the news about Jessica Alba owning a billion dollar company based mostly on her sweet tits and People magazine perfect family. Alba nets out just fine either way. Look at those tits. Do they look worried to you?

Photo Credit: FameFlynet/Splash