Brie Larson Girl Power Extravaganza

April 26, 2017 | celebrity | matt-ralston | 0 Comments

Brie Larson seems desperate to interject herself into any conversation regarding feminism. This has included such harrowing acts as not clapping when Casey Affleck won an Oscar and making a bunch of money to star in a movie about a woman who was kidnapped and raped repeatedly. To be fair, it made as much sense when Tom Hanks became a spokesperson for veterans after Saving Private Ryan. Though Hanks never actually believed he fought in the Battle of the Bulge. 

In a recent interview Larson relayed a yarn about how she was feeling melancholy while doing press to promote Room, but had her fortunes change when she entered a group text with three of the most obnoxious pseudo feminist blowhards in the entire country: 

“I felt lonely and bad sometimes. I was embarrassed to keep talking about myself. Emma [Stone] wrote this beautiful e-mail out of nowhere, and then one day Jen sent me a text message after she saw Room, and we started talking. The text, Brie revealed, ended up being a group chat including Lena Dunham and Amy Schumer. That [group of friends] saved my life.”

So Lena Dunham told you its okay to talk about yourself ad nauseum? She’s actually wrong, and she’s repulsive. Interesting touch with “saved my life”. Did you mean that literally or just as an expression? Please clarify immediately so you can wax about the plight of teen suicide from your infinity pool. Drop the act.

Larson then explained the heart wrenching process of accepting the lead role in Captain Marvel, which she did to encourage confidence in young women and it also happened to be her highest paying offer by a multiple of ten: 

“I had to sit with myself, think about my life and what I want out of it. Ultimately, I couldn’t deny the fact that this movie is everything I care about, everything that’s progressive and important and meaningful, and a symbol I wished I would’ve had growing up. I really, really feel like it’s worth it if it can bring understanding and confidence to young women—I’ll do it.” 

Larson is either extremely shrewd or has had enough smoke blown up her ass to propel a hot air balloon to the moon. Either way this eighth grade level solipsism is fucking annoying. And very convenient. A lot of people profited off of the Holocaust. At least half of them had to know it was total bullshit. Can’t wait for the sequel where Captain Marvel eradicates sexism one shitty GCI effect at a time. 

Also if you hate talking about yourself, why did you post the cover of the magazine in which you said that to your Instagram? 

Photo Credit: Instagram 

Tags: amy schumer

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