Chloë Grace Moretz is slowly learning to love and embrace her boy body. And if you’re a man that has ever lusted after her shape, you should come to terms with your wavering sexuality. Because you’re into lesbians. Not the “two drinks and she wants to slip two fingers in her best friend” kind either. Brooklyn Beckham broke Chloë’s heart so she’s decided to move on from him and dating men altogether. Moretz is all about that model muff now. Just when you thought her ex-boyfriend couldn’t get anymore pathetic he joins the weak penis Robert Pattinson club, making women more bitter and turned off by men than an all women’s college experience.
Chloë Grace Moretz has a new lady in her life.
“The Miseducation of Cameron Post” actress, 21, was spotted kissing model Kate Harrison after a dinner date at Nobu Malibu on Monday night. Afterward, they headed to Soho House and left the club arm-in-arm before stopping to participate in a makeout session that apparently lasted about half an hour.
This is Moretz’s first public romance since her relationship with Brooklyn Beckham.
The main issue I have with Chloë isn’t her particle board shaped body, or that she wishes to finger slam women without any sense of direction in their life, no. It’s the damn umlauts in her name that’s the most annoying. Save spelling like that for IKEA furniture. I’m tired of typing special characters for celebrities that aren’t that special. I understand that she’s probably easier to nail than a Swedish side table that came with instructions and assembly tools inside the box, but can you please, for the love of God, make it just as easy for the rest of us to spell your name without going the extra mile.