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Sara Sampaio Sells El Diablo (VIDEO)

March 25, 2015 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

This chick is Portuguese which makes her the perfect model to be leading a fast food restaurant push into Mexican themed burgers. The Thickburger El Diablo has raw jalapeños, deep-fried jalapenos, and a slathering of groundwater scum collected from... READ MORE

Sara Sampaio and Romee Strijd Ass Check

February 23, 2015 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Of all the calls to action at last night’s Oscars, Iñárritu’s speech about respecting immigrants touched me somewhere in my moral center. I’ve decided to start with these two foreign models. They seem like hard workers and solid additions... READ MORE

Victoria’s Secret Models Sell Better Without Lingerie

October 21, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

As much as it will cost a small Asian village a week of textile wages, a few child starvations are the price of seeing a bunch of Victoria’s Secret models without their lingerie. Underwear is but a contrivance of... READ MORE

Sara Sampaio Models Lingerie

July 21, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

This chick is the hottest thing to come out of Portugal since, fuck, I can’t name anything else. There’s a sausage I think that’s Portuguese at my local brat place. It’s pretty damn tasty. But it’s a distant second... READ MORE

Sara Sampaio Is My New Favorite Portuguese Person

January 17, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

It used to be Vasco da Gama, because I love pepper and it’s bullshit that before da Gama, you couldn’t get cracked black pepper on your salad at fancy restaurants. But now I’m going with Sara Sampaio because her... READ MORE

Sara Sampaio Is Extremely Good Looking

March 22, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

I’ve never met a girl from Portugal who wasn’t hot. I’ve met three. They’ve all been out of my league, by several leagues. Put Sara Sampaio in that category. I feel like she’s perhaps one of the best looking... READ MORE

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