Literally dozens of fans have been left with nothing to do this evening since the announcement that Brett Michaels will not perform tonight in Myrtle Beach, because Sunday night he got demolished by the stage at the Tony Awards (video of that here, bigger damage pic and one more here and here). BrettMichaels.com - wait, what? - says…
“Unfortunately due injuries suffered at the Tony awards Sunday night, the Bret Michaels show scheduled for tonight in Myrtle Beach has been postponed and rescheduled for Thursday August 6th. Due to a large stage prop that struck Bret’s head further tests are being conducted on his head and spine. Bret Michaels solo tour dates will resume June 12th in Gadsden Alabama and will continue throughout the summer.”
Oh no. What will all those chubby, unloved 42-year-old women do now? They had their struggling-to-beat hearts set on this. They even cut the fingers off some new black leather gloves. Oh well. Looks like a few lucky kitty kats are getting some new scarves knit for them tonight!
I’m sure there was a perfectly logical reason for Poison to performentertain be on stage at the Tony awards last night, but I could live a hundred years and never guess what that might have been. They sang a number they call “Don’t Need Nothing” and then (*wink*) they add “But A Good Time” in parenthethes. After that the stage dropped on Brett Michael’s head, a number the audience called, “The Most Awesome Thing We’ve Ever Seen Here”.
The reason Brett Michaels is on the VH1 show "Rock of Love" is because he was the lead singer for the 80's glam rock band Poison. No one ever cares about the drummer, so no one made him a show that lines up whores to bang, so in this case he raped someone in Mississippi. And this isn't really related, but remember that scene in "Evil Dead" where the girl gets raped by a tree. WTF was that all about. TMZ says…
(Rocket) was arrested on a rape warrant issued out of Mississippi as he arrived at LAX after getting off a flight from New Zealand, police said. Rikki Rockett, 46, was arrested Monday at the airport and booked into the Los Angeles County Jail He was held on a strong-arm rape warrant stemming from Neshoba County, Mississippi, and appears to have been released from L.A. County custody, the Sheriff's Web site shows. His status today could not be confirmed. Details about the warrant were not immediately available.
I think most people would agree that I'm the real victim here, because this forced me to try to find a picture of Rikki Rocket. I don’t have any of those, so please enjoy "Rape of the Sabine Women", by Schönfeld, which I prefer to the more popular version by Rubens. My zest for life continues to overcome!
