Yesterday, Lady Gaga cancelled her next 4 concert dates because of a hip injury that kept her from walking. Not “hip” as in the way the young people of today use the word, but her actual hip bone.

Now Rolling Stone says she needs surgery and her entire tour will be canceled, all 21 of the remaining dates, which will not effect me or anyone I know in any way.

Gaga has a labral tear of the right hip, which will require an operation “followed by strict downtime to recover.” The condition affects the ring of soft tissue lining the outside rim of the hip socket. 

So, a few months ago, Gaga gained a bunch of weight and now she’s hurt herself from all the jumping around. This might be why the words “surgery” and “sugary” are practically identical.

Lady Gaga, who last year pushed herself around stage in a wheelchair during a concert in Sydney, has had to postpone her next 4 concerts because of “synovitis, a severe inflammation of the joints”, making it painful for her to walk. If only blind piano player Ray Charles were still around to console her during her time of need.

A few months ago, Lady Gaga announced that she was bulimic and anorexic, so, great news everyone, because it looks like she’s conquered that. Assuming the thing she wanted to get ripped was the seat of her pants when she bent over, her “BODY REVOLUTION” is going great.

(image source of gaga on stage in vancouver = splash)

Lady Gaga went on her blog today to announce that she’s donating $1,000,000 to help those effected by Hurricane Sandy. But only for New York it seems. Go tell Bon Jovi your problems, Jersey.

“Today I pledge 1 million dollars to New York & The American Red Cross for Hurricane Sandy Relief. If it wasn’t for NYC: the Lower Eastside, Harlem, the Bronx and Brooklyn, I would not be the woman or artist that I am today. New York is relentless ambition, a drive to succeed, a place where there is a natural pursuit of diversity through compassion. Please accept this gift on behalf of myself, my parents Joe and Cynthia, and my sister Natali; with our deepest gratitude New York for raising us. Thank you for helping me build my spirit. I will now help you rebuild yours. Sincerely, Lady Gaga and The Germanottas.”

Lindsay Lohan is from New York too, I wonder if she has any plans to help out. I bet she’d be flattered if someone asked her to contribute, instead of what they usually ask her, which is, “hey, you wanna go fuck in the bathroom?”