Monday headlines, with Michelle Hunziker in a bikini

By brendon May 23, 2011 @ 4:59 PM


TREE OF LIFE – won the equivalent of Best Picture at the Cannes Fim Festival this weekend, but experts don’t think that will help much at the box office. But how can that be? Everyone loves the French. If those socialist pussies liked the movie, it should do great here in America. (la times)

KIRSTEN DUNST – was the winner of the Best Actress award at Cannes for her work in ‘Melancholia’. As you now know, Cannes selects winners by randomly choosing a name out of a hat. (ew)

GWYENETH PALTROW – was supposed to be all set to sign a record deal with Atlantic six weeks ago, but talks have stalled, perhaps because she wanted too much money upfront ($1M). Wait, Paltrow is being an unreasonable pain in the ass? Well this is the fist I’ve heard of anything like that. (ny post)

PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN 4 – made $90M in its opening weekend, which means there will no doubt be a number 5. If it stars Johnny Depp and Penelope Cruz again, they should call it ‘Voyage of the Mumblers’. (mojo)

MICHELLE HUNZIKER – is a Swiss model, and this weekend she was on the beach in Italy. That’s her in the purple bikini, in case you weren’t putting the pieces together yet. (splash news)

(20) Comments

  1. avatar
    ohmwrecker 05/23/2011 17:05

    “Voyage of the Mumblers” ha!

    brenduhn has still got it!

    Hey . . . . the comments are back on!

  2. avatar
    ohmwrecker 05/23/2011 17:05

    Fuck . . . First!

    Do you guys still do that?

  3. avatar
    i hate you 05/23/2011 17:14

    we usually just throw cum on the wall, but the curtains got pretty gross down in the bunker. you can call first since you didn’ t know.

  4. avatar
    MrAdams 05/23/2011 17:21

    Spider man, Spider man, does some stuff and whatever…

    I need to pay closer attention to the lyrics.

  5. avatar
    Mr. Pickles 05/23/2011 17:24

    I miss the bunker! It was nice and quiet down there.

    *goes to bunker, sits in dark, screams like girl when sees a bug, runs out screaming shaking goop off hands*

    Okay, it’s scarey down there.


  6. avatar
    ohmwrecker 05/23/2011 17:26

    Which bunker? “werewolves”?

  7. avatar
    ohmwrecker 05/23/2011 17:32

    So . . . what’s been goin’ on ’round here?

  8. avatar
    i hate you 05/23/2011 17:37

    1st picture of every post with a picture. we have been down there for months brother. you haven’t missed much unless you’re a fan of copy and paste in a way you’ve never experienced it.

  9. avatar
    ohmwrecker 05/23/2011 17:40

    I was here for the Poolman epidemic . . . was it worse than that?

    And why did Brendumb take the comments away?

  10. avatar
    MrAdams 05/23/2011 17:42

    “The Bunker” is also known as “The Daycare from Hell”.

  11. avatar
    i hate you 05/23/2011 17:42

    i think i saw some evidence of poolman over on werewolves. it may have been equal, but you’d have to check with the older regulars to know for sure.

    we don’t know. we were all just hanging out, saying how smart he was and how much we cared about his feelings and then poof they were gone.

  12. avatar
    Mr. Nutt 05/23/2011 17:43

    We were commenting under the first picture of every post that had a picture.

    Tyler, speaking of Joust, I was waiting for a mustache joke from you earlier.

  13. avatar
    i hate you 05/23/2011 18:13

    one of durden’s soldiers claims that his comments are blocked.

  14. avatar
    Mr. Nutt 05/23/2011 18:14


  15. avatar
    i hate you 05/23/2011 18:15

    the wookie has been taken captive apparently. this is not a drill.

  16. avatar
    uknowwhere2findme 05/23/2011 18:22

    Everything is working just fine…Tyler shut the fuck up and make us a round.

  17. avatar
    uknowwhere2findme 05/23/2011 18:24

    Welcome back Ohmwrecker…you still playing your shitty music?

  18. avatar
    Mr. Nutt 05/23/2011 18:25


  19. avatar
    rokan 05/23/2011 18:26

    Well. . . . Look what the cat dragged in?

    Welcome back, ohm.

    Its true, I was unable to pst this morning, and I tried all 11 puppets. Now that I am back in the airport men’s room with my blackberry, everything is peachy-keen.

    Technology is funny.

  20. avatar
    Observer 05/24/2011 15:35

    This chick in the purple…(or is it “Lilac”) bikini makes me wish I was fucking some cute chick……..

    …I like that effect from a chick…

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