Monday headlines, with Brooke Burke in a bikini

By brendon August 15, 2011 @ 4:19 PM


JESSICA ALBA – gave birth to her second child Saturday night, another baby girl, named Haven Garner Warren. There’s no word on if Alba is home from the hospital yet, but since she’s Mexican she’ll probably stop at the mall first to have Havens ears pierced. (facebook)

AUSTIN POWERS 4 – is or is not on the way. Hit Fix says the deal is done, Deadline says nothing is official yet. For now, Halloween stores everywhere will just have to cross their fingers. (hit fix, deadline)

TARA REID – tweeted that she got married in Greece on Saturday just a few hours after tweeting that she was engaged. Some thought the lucky fella was ex-boyfriend Michael Lilleund or ex-fiance Michael Axtmann, but it’s actually some guy named Zack Kehayov, which I bet will be news to Tara once the ouzo wears off. (people)

JOHNNY DEPP – was reuniting with director Gore Verbinski and producer Jerry Bruckheimer, who first teamed up to make ‘Pirates of the Caribbean’, to play Tonto in a film version of ‘The Lone Ranger’, but Disney shut production down on Friday because the budget was already at 250 million. It’s a lot of money, but try to think of even one western that cost less that 200 million. You can’t name even one can you? If you wan’t to film two guys on horses, it’s gonna cost you. (la times)

BROOKE BURKE – spent the weekend with her husband David Charvet on the beach in St. Barths, all part of the MILF bikini contest that Hollywood was apparently holding. (splash)

(31) Comments

  1. avatar
    i hate you 08/15/2011 16:29

    welcome to milf dot com. where we post pictures of hot moms and their children. if you have been accused of child related crimes, please exit. thank you.

  2. avatar
    RangerLG 08/15/2011 16:40

    I don’t care who you are, but if Brooke Burke doesn’t make your sphincter tingle, you are gay!

  3. avatar
    MrAdams 08/15/2011 16:41

    (sigh) I wonder what Batman is doing right now?

  4. avatar
    Mr. Poop 08/15/2011 17:20

    I’d really like to sniff her asshole.

    I mean the kind of sniff you give a towel full of chloroform before they cut your leg off back in the Civil War.

  5. avatar
    Observer 08/15/2011 17:34

    …bugger, corn-hole, ass-fuck……

    …the technical term is not that important……’s the spirit….

  6. avatar
    Shitcock 08/15/2011 17:48

    What a great ass. That girl definitely takes after her mom.

  7. avatar
    Mr. Nutt 08/15/2011 17:50

    Whatever she did or didn’t do to keep her body she needs to write a book and pass it out for free to every high school girl. I’ll help.

  8. avatar
    Mr. Poop 08/15/2011 17:51


    Here’s a picture of Heidi Klum I thought you might appreciate.

  9. avatar
    Mr. Poop 08/15/2011 17:52

    The little girl is holding the exact kind of net I use to fish turds out of the pool

  10. avatar
    Observer 08/15/2011 17:55

    Mr. Poop……

    …I agree with you on the usefulness of that type of net……

    ….I’m curious, though… you swim in your septic tank…?

  11. avatar
    Mr. Poop 08/15/2011 17:58


    But I do look for salamanders when the drainfield overflows.

  12. avatar
    Mr. Nutt 08/15/2011 18:00

    You know you are eating right when the grass is greenest over the septic field.

  13. avatar
    Mr. Poop 08/15/2011 18:09


    Are you going to vote for Bachman because she understands the importance of bondage in a gay relationship?

  14. avatar
    i hate you 08/15/2011 18:15

    is it gay if i show you my rather impressive penis if it is flacid?

  15. avatar
    Observer 08/15/2011 18:17

    … it hetero if I mention that I would fuck the innocence out of this chick…….???

    ….why can’t we get some bikini pics of her….?

  16. avatar
    i hate you 08/15/2011 18:18

    obs, i think you may be on to something here.

  17. avatar
    Mr. Poop 08/15/2011 18:27


    Is it gay to want to smell your schwantz after you de-flower her.

    Pepper always used to let me.

  18. avatar
    Mr. Poop 08/15/2011 18:29

    . . . course, those were with tranny’s and they are always a little too tangy for my tastes.

  19. avatar
    Observer 08/15/2011 18:48

    … dick ALWAYS smells like it needs a second helping after it porks some dame…..

    ….whether she still had her flower (delicate maidenhood) or not…..

  20. avatar
    Mr. Nutt 08/15/2011 18:52

    New up.

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