Lance Armstrong Had to Cheat

By Lex June 28, 2013 @ 3:39 PM

Lance Armstrong is working his way through the six stages of grief. Or the five steps of loss. Or some such shit when you lose all of your career titles and accomplishments because you got caught cheating and being a dick. His latest step involves justifying his doping as necessary to win the Tour de France since everybody else was doing it. Oh, so if everybody else was cutting out a nut you’d do that too, Lance? What Lance really should be saying is that cycling is an intensely boring, insipid, and utterly French spectator sport, that without a chemically-injected beast to give it character, would basically just be women’s basketball. People would still hate him, but at least he’d be telling the truth.

(5) Comments

  1. avatar
    iSlomoshun 06/28/2013 16:01

    “insipid”? What has this site come to?

    Shame on you for using adjectives 90% of your readers don’t know.

  2. avatar
    Admiral 06/28/2013 16:11

    Admitting you don’t know what words mean is brave of you, islomoshun. And very stupid, as well.

  3. avatar
    hepmike 06/28/2013 16:20

    To say that it’s an “utterly french” spectator sport is pretty ignorant. Why- because you know that the TDF takes place in France? There are stage races all over Europe, and the US for that matter. And if you think it’s “intensely boring”, well…that just tells me you don’t ride. Those matters aside, Lance is a DB.

  4. avatar
    iSlomoshun 06/28/2013 16:39

    Oh I know what insipid means. But I guarantee 90% of this sites readers don’t..which I’ve already stated. Try to chuckle at the jokes next time.

  5. avatar
    Mud Nugget 07/01/2013 12:58

    The Unaballer

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