Stephen King Thinks The Farrows Are Bitches

Author Stephen King apologized for a Tweet in which he said that Dylan and Mia Farrow are going after Woody Allen out of “bitchiness”. For some reason the horror novelist hobbit thought it a good idea to enter the social media shit storm that is the Allen/Farrow molestation back and forth. People have been SCREAAMMMIINGGG in all caps on both sides of the issue for weeks now. Woody and Mia’s daughter Dylan recently drudged up the old allegations about her nebbish dad diddling her after he received a lifetime achievement award at the Golden Globes a few weeks back. When a fanboy asked Stephen King what he thought of the whole thing he tweeted,

“Boy, I’m stumped on that one. I don’t like to think it’s true, and there’s an element of palpable bitchery there, but…”

Then people jumped down his throat, came out his ass, and jumped back down his throat creating a virtual ass to mouth literary metaphor. People didn’t like that he was implying that there was sour grapes on Mia and Dylan’s behalf because of Woody breaking up with Mia then banging her adopted daughter, that slutty temptress, Soon Yi. Stephen King might turn out a 500 page book every week about something creepy happening in the woods, but he’s no match the for self-defined experts working 140 characters or less on Twitter. It’s like bringing a bazooka to a labia lip fight. Get out now, Stephen!