Heidi Klum Owns the World

March 3, 2015 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen | 0 Comments

America’s Got Talent. But not necessarily enough to find American hosts for the America’s Got Talent show. I’m no jingoist, but if we’re pulling Howie Mandel out of our asses we might as well invite ISIS Toyota pickups to cruise down the pot-holed streets of our fruited plains. I’d keep Heidi Klum in the off-chance one drunken night she mistakes me for somebody handsome and mounts me like an SS Guard raping ghetto Poles, but entertainment is one of the few categories we still lead the world. That and comfort eating. We lose those and we become Canada. I’d rather die.

Photo Credit: FameFlynet

Tags: heidi klum

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