Clooney Leans In

George Clooney defended raising tens of millions of dollars for Hillary Clinton at weekend fundraisers for really rich people who have their nannies mule untraceable cash down to Panamanian banks. Clooney would’ve made a superior slick defense attorney. He has the confident smile of a man who knows he can fuck other men’s wife. Rather than defending the $35K to $330K per plate buy-in to the events, Clooney redirected the shit out of the question:

We had some protesters last night when we pulled up in San Francisco and they’re right to protest. They’re absolutely right. It is an obscene amount of money. The Sanders campaign when they talk about it is absolutely right. It’s ridiculous that we should have this kind of money in politics. I agree completely.

If Sammy Sosa hasn’t suddenly misplaced his English he could’ve cruised past Congress with this circular logic parry. I agree that it’s totally ridiculous how rampant steroid are in baseball. Next question. Oh, dios mio, look at the time. Vamanos. The hate the game not the players argument doesn’t hold when you also run the game. Reverse the faces on this screen with the serial killer looking dude trying to pull a similar fast one and it gets nowhere. The vegan veal was slightly overcooked. No lesbian sex in the West Wing or I’m asking for my money back.

Here’s Bernie protestors outside the Clinton fundraisers. They’d be more intimidating if but one of them could bench press half their body weight.