Mara Wilson Jumps the Gay Plight Train

Nothing says I got your back, Orlando, like announcing that you’re now identifying as queer even though you’re not. Everybody has their own form of empty gestures of support. Switching teams really is the most dramatic. In the wake of the Pulse nightclub shootings, child actress Mara Wilson has declared she’s bisexual because she partied at a gay bar as a teen.

I have never had a better experience at a club than I did then. Great music and people. And one of my friends met his partner that night! I haven’t been to one since college, except once when a friend brought me along. I didn’t feel like I belonged there. But the LGBTQ community has always felt like home, especially a few years later when I, uh, learned something about myself.

Did you, uh, start fucking chicks? If so, just say that. When pressed for more details, Wilson claimed it was all private, but that she scored a 2 out of a possible 6 on the Kinsey scale of homosexuality. For reference purposes, the average score of girls attending Smith College is a 7. At least white college kids marching with BlackLivesMatter get some exercise. Scissor kissing pictures or this never happened. Many of us imagined this moment since Mrs. Doubtfire

_{Photo credit: Mara Wilson/Twitter}