Ukrainian prankster slash physically assaultive douchebag in an ironic hat, Vitali Sediuk, struck the ass of Kim Kardashian with his bare lips during her visit to Paris today. The lack of use of a dental dam or other prophylactic could be used in court as an insanity defense. Welcome to the wonderful world of epidemiology, asshole. You used those lips to kiss Will Smith. This is how the Hot Zone forms.
It’s unclear how this same cat makes it around place to place throughout Europe assaulting women in the name of publicity or some bizarre celebrity fetish. Kim Kardashian deserves a ton of ill will. But assaulting whores remains outside the current social contract. Especially by a cowardly man who leaps out from crowds and later cries on the ground after a minimal full-nelson by security.
A few people need to handle their shit a little better here. Interpol for one. I’d Brexit the fuck out of Europe as well if they can’t contain the movement of their noteworthy jackasses. This same tool grabbed Gigi Hadid just a week ago in Milan. How is he in Paris days later doing the same? You run drunk on the field in Yankee Stadium and make NYPD chase you around and you won’t be walking for another four to six months.
It’s all fun and games until the next dude is screaming Allahu Akbar and he’s strapped into a funky looking vest. Or the last dude in the case of Paris. Consider this prankster asshole your dry run. You failed. As did Kardashian’s security. Up that shit. You’re worth a hundred and forty million and climbing. Get some Hells Angels. They occasionally stab people, but nobody’s going to weep for Vitali. This is why we let celebrities publicly demand gun control while secretly applying for concealed weapons permits for their security and themselves.
Photo Credit: AKM-GSI