Paris Hilton Big in Belgrade

If you want to know the world’s most in demand DJ, look no further than the intellectually underrated Paris Hilton. The devil-may-care blonde heiress and her structurally impossible pushed up B-cups have been touring big deal club parties from Italian Fashion Week to Belgrade Ethnic Cleansing celebrations. She pulls down six-figures a pop to spin her records at 33, or 45 as they appear to her lazy eye. Also not records. Pressing play and one ear in the headphones will do. Panties optional. Though that does preclude cash tips.

Anybody who saw Paris Hilton rammed up against a light-pole ten years ago giggling from behind her designer airbags did not see this persistence of purchasing power coming. It’s hard to know whether to admire a rich chick for ambitiously building a business when she has zero need for new cash or to lament the fact that DJs make more than public school teachers. I choose neither. These Serbian party gigs are open to everybody. Let the market decide. It has. Dudes in black silk shirts want Paris. Gender pay inequality is for women who weren’t trying to turn men on by eleven.

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