Antonio Cromartie To Have 14th Kid

Despite having considerable difficulty naming all of his offspring, Antonio Cromartie is expecting his fourteenth kid, making it his sixth with his current wife Terricka Cromartie. This comes on the heels of Cromartie getting a vasectomy because he apparently gets chicks pregnant even when getting a hand job over the pants. Suffice to say he’s got pretty strong genes. A good number of his relatives play in the NFL. He’s Haitian. What’s the life expectancy over there, Cory Haim? Clearly this is some sort of R Selection strategy as opposed to the traditional K. Terricka Cromartie broke the news on Instagram: 

“In the up an coming CROMARTIE DRAFT of 2017, with the 6th OverAll Pick. Will the Cromartie’s Draft a Boy or a Girl. J6 coming soon #6months #25weeks #boyorgirl #3girls2boys #sexunknown #j6 #commentJNames #lovingmybabies #happymothersday #bowwowchallenge #ornah.”

Are you building a family here or a defensive line? It’s frankly not a bad retirement strategy, at least one of these kids will be able to play ball. Farmers used to pop them out because they needed extra hands. If their wives died making all the babies, they got to marry her younger sister and nobody said a word. Good deal for the farmers. Someone has to pull landscaping duty at the McMansion. 

Because of the list of weird tags following her post, some people are speculating this is some sort of practical joke. This is a huge mistake. Do not ever doubt the power of the Antonio Cromartie dong. Fifteen years from now when his children make up the bulk of the voting block in your district you’re going to ask for forgiveness. In the meantime just out of precaution do not let your wife sit on any bench in any NFL locker room until Cromartie retirement plus three years.

_{Photo Credit: Instagram}