Any “woke” woman with a septum ring piercing and Twitter account has probably already alerted all seventeen of her followers to the egregious ways of Madame Tussauds’ in regards to Beyoncé. Never white wash a Nubian queen. Or in this case white wax. I couldn’t fathom anything more important to complain about right now. Erroneous depictions of the caramel queen crafted from the wrong complexion of crayola? Bey-Hive assemble! On social media at least. Prominent leaders of the outrage culture caused enough disturbance for Madame Tussauds to take the statue down.
“In Madame Tussauds we trust.” At least until last week — when a fraction of the Internet looked at a single photo of the statue at the museum’s New York location, concluded it was too white, and briefly forced its removal for emergency restyling.
You’re in the middle of Times Square in New York. You want to see entertainment? Skip the overpriced admission to the candle people museum. Find the McDonald’s right next door to the house of wax. Tell the man lounging in a pool of his own urine that the guy dressed as a robot playing the flute a few feet down stole from his tip jar. You’re welcome. It’s beyond racist to assume Beyoncé wants to match her blonde weave with other blonde features. Wasn’t it punishment enough graduating college to build wax figures of people way wealthier than you. Now every feminist in America is mad at you. Also, send a cease and desist to all children drawing crayon pictures of Beyoncé and coloring them in with regular brown instead of Beyoncé brown. Because they’re real monsters of society.
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