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Kelly Brook Headlines Ping Pong

November 12, 2015 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Even women with big racks have to pay rent. It’s the great equalizer. Not every Ellen lesbian lifestyle normalization sitcom sticks. That’s how you find yourself in a low cut tight dress at a Chinese food restaurant opening. That... READ MORE

Kelly Brook Banging Her Trainer

May 29, 2015 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Somehow the Ellen produced sit-com about happy go lucky lesbian cliches got canceled. No matter. She didn’t need the money and the bodies of those who let her down are now buried in her backyard as a reminder to... READ MORE

Kelly Brook Sunbathing

May 4, 2015 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

I like this English chick. She got stuck in Ellen’s uninspired lesbian sitcom but she’s going to turn that into something big, like a real estate mogul husband or a fat lawsuit against Ellen for being her boss and... READ MORE

Kelly Brook Glistens

April 21, 2015 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

It’s easy to ride magazines for Photoshopping the shit out of images until they all look cartoonish. It’s more difficult to admit the touchups make masturbating that much easier. Kelly Brook now has lean muscle mass and tits that... READ MORE

Kelly Brook Needs a Better Show

March 23, 2015 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Ellen’s produced sitcom about a super hot blond lesbian chick making a baby with her supportive straight guy friend isn’t doing well with critics outside of those in Hollywood who fear for their working lives. You talk shit about... READ MORE

Kelly Brook Prepping for Ellen’s Lez-Com

February 3, 2015 | Photos | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Kelly Brook got kind of fat there for a while. Even the people who routinely call women curvy were feeling uncomfortable with their made up word. The TV camera adds ten pounds. Which means you need to be at... READ MORE

Lesbians Are the New Lesbians

January 21, 2015 | Photos | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Ellen Degeneres produced a TV show and picked the random category of lesbian as the subject matter. It’s Elisha Cuthbert as a hot stacked lesbian the way lesbians dream lesbians look but only really exist to be married to... READ MORE

Kelly Brook Understands Halloween, Heidi Klum Doesn’t

November 4, 2014 | Photos | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

I find the adult subversion of Halloween to be one of the lamer modern social conventions. There’s a bunch of fun stuff we cast off as we grow up like our tinker toys and Happy Meals and the naive... READ MORE

The Kelly Brook 2015 Calendar Is a Good Time Keeper

October 22, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

There’s a time and a place for artificially enhancing a woman’s looks by way of illegally downloaded software. If you’re still buying wall calendars with pictures of hot chicks with big tits, you’re the time and place. There’s a... READ MORE

Kelly Brook Strikes Me as Jaunty

October 18, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

I’m pretty sure Kelly Brook’s knockers are ripening with the season. Maybe she’s pregnant with ideas. She could also just be getting chunky. British women allow themselves that wretched fate after a breakup. In stark contrast to American celebrities... READ MORE

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