If you’re a model and you’re not going to wear a bikini to your own bikini line launch, I’m not buying. I work for my money. I’m the president and a client. I know you’re British so let me... READ MORE

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This British chick designs, fabricates, sews, scissors, packs, ships, and sells her own swimsuit line. She also wears them around vacation hotspots so other women will ask her where she bought her suit and she can modestly say, check... READ MORE

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Kimberley Garner has starred on a reality TV series in England, so naturally she also describes herself as a model and actress, because that’s the kind of bullshit logic that reality shows teach people. But I wouldn’t even be... READ MORE

Kimberley Garner is either posing for a photo shoot or she’s trying really hard to let men know she’s fertile. It could be both. When I see a girl like that on the beach, I’m always thinking the same... READ MORE

Sometimes a woman’s ass is so fine, you just want to do something stupid. Like write her a poem or tell her you have a real job or ask her to marry you. The poetry and the lying stuff... READ MORE

Fame is an elusive bitch. Like the exact opposite of a stalker girlfriend who won’t give you back your apartment key. This one’s trying not to be found. Kimberley Garner was on a reality show in Britain but she’s... READ MORE