Oscar Pistorius Had Angry Blue Balls

Reeva Steenkamp's mom wrote a book about her daughter because it's not a tragedy until somebody gets a publishing deal. Mom claims Reeva would not allow Pistorius to have sex with her during the entire time they dated. I actually just assume dating means fucking so now mom's got me confused.These two must have ridden a lot of Ferris wheels and eaten a lot of ice cream. According to Mom, Pistorius was a violent lunatic...read more

Oscar Pistorius Gets But A Few Months in the Hoosegow

Oscar Pistorius was sentenced to five years in prison for culpable homicide, which is South Africa's version of, don't blast your gun through closed doors in your house because you thought you heard something, asshole. He was acquitted of the actual intentional killing of his hot model girlfriend because everyone agreed that hot models are easier to replace in this world than legless Olympic gold medalists. Pistorious...read more

Oscar Pistorius Has A Disconnect

There are some serious issues involved with sentencing Oscar Pistorius for Culpable Homicide, which is apparently a South African term for execution. It appears he threw his dead girlfriend's parents some cash because they were struggling financially after he killed her, yet when offered a lump sum of $34,000 dollars they considered it "Blood Money." I guess that would make his previous offers Blood Change which...read more

Oscar Pistorius Bounces on Murder Charges

Oscar Pistorius, the infamous Blade Runner olympic athlete and his high tech artificial legs were acquitted of all murder charges related to him shooting the shit out of his model girlfriend on Valentine's Day 2013. You may recall Pistorius claims he heard noises from behind his bathroom door early that morning and like any reasonable man, he started unloading his gun through the closed door lest it be an armed...read more

Oscar Pistorius Ruled Not Crazy

A judge ruled that Oscar Pistorius cannot claim insanity in his murder defense because shooting your nagging girlfriend seems pretty normal to most dudes. Pistorius' lawyers now must rely on the dumbass defense as to why Oscar shot at a supposed intruder through a closed door. Shoot first and ask questions later, especially when you have an even money chance of killing the burglar in your toilet and not your...read more

Oscar Pistorius Really Misses the Girlfriend He Shot on Valentine's Day

So maybe Oscar Pistorius kind of shot his girlfriend on Valetine's morning. He says it was an accident. He has no legs, so I'm inclined to believe him. Now, one year later, and just coincidentally a couple weeks before his murder trial, Oscar Pistorious is posting romantic photos of he and Reeva Steenkamp, the girlfriend he accidentally blasted through a bathroom door once or thrice. Oscar says he remains devastated...read more

Oscar Pistorius Bounces

Cyborg probable murderer Oscar Pistorius was granted permission by a South African judge to travel overseas and compete. You'll recall that the world famous Olympian was accused of shooting his girlfriend.... four times. According to Oscar, he thought she was just a super hot home invasion robber. Oscar was allowed out while his trial was set up but can now pretty much go about his life like before. It just goes to...read more