06.08.2011 Wednesday headlines

THE HANGOVER 3 - is already in development, and Zach Galafianakis says the story will center around his character getting sprung from a mental institution. In other words, expect to see his ass in a hospital gown. (rolling stone)

SALT 2 - could be on the way now that Angelina Jolie has agreed to do it and Sony has hired Kurt Wimmer to write a script. Might I suggest showing her ass in a hospital gown. (mtv)

SIENNA MILLER - got an apology from London tabloid News of the World after they published information they learned after hacking her cell phone. Pardon me, a “sincere” apology. So that seems fair. Look Sienna, we could go back and forth all day about who’s to blame and never get to the bottom of it, but they obviously feel terrible so let’s just call it even. (the ap)

NAOMIE HARRIS - who might best be known for playing voo doo witch/Calypso in ‘Pirates of the Caribbean’ 2 and 3, is in talks to be the female lead in the next James Bond movie. Will she get it? Oh, I’m on pins and needles! (ew)

RAMONA NITU - was on ‘Jersey Shore’ last season, and yesterday she was on South Beach, and… ok, I’m not gonna lie to you; posting these pictures seemed like a much better idea when they were just thumbnails. (bauer griffin)

18 photos in gallery >

Tags: angelina jolie, bikini, headlines, james bond, jersey shore, naomie harris, ramona nitu, salt, sienna miller, the hangover, zach galifianakis |

13 Comments

05.23.2011 January Jones is sort of a bitch

The reason you always hear nice stories about people like Tom Hanks and Sandra Bullock and bitchy stories about Jennifer Aniston is because Tom Hanks and Sandra Bullock are nice and Jennifer Aniston is a bitch. It’s not some conspiracy. Everyone in Hollywood didn’t meet in a secret mansion one night and agree to spread crazy stories about some random person for no reason.

So with that in mind, here’s another story about how January Jones is sort of a bitch. E! says…

Zach Galifianakis opens up about January Jones in an interview with Shortlist.
Asked by the interviewer about a complimentary comment Jones made to the site, calling (Zach) the most “naturally funny” man she’d ever met, Galifianakis seemed completely baffled by her sweetness.
“That’s really funny because, if I remember correctly, she and I were very rude to each other. It was crazy,” he explains. “I was at a party—I’d never met her—and she was like, ‘Come sit down.’ So I sit at her table and talk for 10 minutes, and she goes, ‘I think it’s time for you to leave now.’ ”
And what did he come back with?
“So, I say, ‘January, you are an actress in a show and everybody’s going to forget about you in a few years, so f–king be nice’ and I got up and left. And she thinks that’s funny?”

This chick really does seem completely in love with herself, so she probably only heard, ‘January, you are an actress in a show…” and then she tuned out. She probably doesn’t even know that she and Zach have ever met. At best she would remember something about a party and young Santa Claus kneeling before her and saying how much he loved her show.

7 photos in gallery >

Tags: january jones, zach galifianakis |

26 Comments

10.22.2010 Friday morning headlines

BRADLEY COOPER - was NOT one of the cast members who complained about Mel Gibson and got him kicked off ‘Hangover 2′, and only E! is giving credit/blame to anyone but Zach Galifianakis (they say it was Warner Brothers management). Nobody likes a tattle tale, Zach. (e!, tmz)

CHRISTINA AGUILERA - says daily life is a struggle since deciding to get a divorce, and refuses to address any rumors of infidelity. “Out of respect for my husband, I prefer to keep the specifics private.” Oh is that right? Well maybe this… 20 dollar bill will change your mind. (nydn)

TYLER HAS SEXY READERS - ~~like Danielle, the girl in the headline picture, (go to her myspace music page).~~ (UPDATE - Danielle decided she didn’t like that picture. Actually Danielle’s bf didn’t like it. So now it’s a picture of my beloved Brooke.) People liked this contest so it’s back, now with a monthly vote for $1000. Sexy girls have enough obstacles in life - the stigma of beauty, jealousy, books - and up until now they’ve been hot for free. I think that’s terrible, and I’m not gonna stand for it. (contest details)

SEAN PENN - was filming ‘This Must Be The Place’ in NYC yesterday, “dressed in drag (to play) a retired rock star setting out to find his father’s executioner, an ex-Nazi war criminal who is a refugee in the U.S.” Is it me or does it sound like someone dropped two unrelated scripts a few months ago and mixed up some of the pages, and now they’re filming that shit? (pcn)

8 photos in gallery >

Tags: christina aguilera, mel gibson, sean penn, tyler has sexy readers, zach galifianakis |

21 Comments

10.21.2010 Zach Galifianakis got Mel Gibson kicked off Hangover 2

The last time Mel Gibson gave a performance, it was theater of the mind, audio only, and his character was telling his girlfriend he was gonna kill her and bury her in his rose garden.

Gibsons next role was supposed to be in ‘the Hangover 2′, which star Zach Galifianakis was less than happy about, according to New York Magazine. During a podcast for Comedy Death Ray, Zach said…

“But a movie you’re acting in, you don’t have a lot of control — you just show up and vomit your lines out. I’m not the boss. I’m in a deep protest right now with a movie I’m working on, up in arms about something. But I can’t get the guys to [listen] … I’m not making any leeway.”

Update: Zach Galifianakis has made some leeway. Deadline is reporting…

Mel Gibson won’t be appearing in The Hangover Part II. (A statement from director Todd Phillips said): “I thought Mel would have been great in the movie and I had the full backing of Jeff Robinov and his team. But I realize filmmaking is a collaborative effort, and this decision ultimately did not have the full support of my entire cast and crew.”

Deadline goes on to make the excellent point that Mike Tyson was celebrated for his cameo in the first ‘Hangover’, and that animal spent 3 years in jail after he was convicted of rape. The things Mel Gibson said were mean and scary, but isn’t rape worse? And don’t you sort of assume Tyson was saying mean and scary things during the rape, which makes him “just as bad” + “much much worse”? I don’t know what people talk about during rape, but I assume it’s like, “scream and I’ll kill you”, not, “hey remember that scene in ‘Marley and Me’ when the dog jumped in the pool!”

(and now, unrelated pictures of jayde nicole in tiny shorts)

20 photos in gallery >

Tags: mel gibson, zach galifianakis |

41 Comments

12.15.2009 ‘the hangover’ is now on bluray

Comedy is subjective and everyone has different taste, but if you don’t think Zach Galifianakis is a genius than you’re an idiot and I hate you and you owe me, and to a lesser extent Zach, an apology. People think he’s just a comedian and rapper, but he’s a good dancer and has a smoky yet beautiful singing voice. My only complaint is that he doesn’t do more movies. If he were in a movie being released on blu-ray today, the most successful comedy of all time for example, I’d rush to the store and buy it right now, and you’d be a damn fool not to do the same.

Tags: video, zach galifianakis |

29 Comments

11.17.2009 tuesday morning headlines

ZACH GALIFIANAKIS - has a new episode of ‘Between Two Ferns’, this time with Andy Richter and Conan O’Brien. Anything I write here will look dumb compared to even the smallest thing Zach and Andy do in this, so I’m giving up except to say fuck them both. (funny or die)

JESSICA ALBA - has written an article about her trip to DC last week. She says she went, “to pound the pavement and talk about education for the world’s poorest children.” And there’s a picture included of Jessica with Hillary Clinton who is autographing a soccer ball. Problem Solved! (huff post)

JOHNNY DEPP - has signed a deal paying him $35 million to do a fourth ‘Pirates of the Caribbean’ movie. In a related story, I sleep on a bed stuffed with old newspapers and hay. Horray for Hollywood! (the sun)

BEYONCE - carries a small wind machine with her around in clubs, even when she’s sitting down, to “keep her hair blowing everywhere - just like it does in her ‘Crazy in Love’ video.” This is an easier way to look sexy than my suggestion, which was to carry a treadmill everywhere so she could run her fat ass off. (the mirror and wenn images)