BRITNEY SPEARS - is officially dating her agent, Jason Trawick. “They are totally and definitely dating,” a source tells People. “He’s the best thing that’s happened to her.” Well, yeah, but, how hard was that? Basically if he doesn’t push her down the stairs she’ll think he’s David Niven.
No one has any idea who that is, do they?
BRAD PITT - paid 1M for a 9-ft painting called Etappe. This. It sounds expensive but many feel he got a good deal. It would have cost more, except it’s a complete piece of shit. (source = daily mail)
GISELE BUNDCHEN - I don’t want to cock-block the Victoria’s Secret photographer, but someone should tell Giselle about lenses. You don’t need to dry hump the model to get a close-up. She must wonder why Tom Brady doesn’t answer when she watches games through binoculars too. “Toom? Anzer me. Iz me, Gizelle. I’m right nezt to yoo.” (hq jump)
That is a REALLY awesome bra.
I know who David Niven is you condescending hack.
fist fist fist
So, we go from Giselle’s phenomenal body to a stretch mark removal ad…Nicely played cockface.
Just when I thought I couldn’t hate Tom Brady any more….
I noticed that Jean-Claude. And so did my penis.
eww, JCVD i know! that stretch mark removal thing makes me sick to my stomach!
Brad Pitt should commission a painting of his cock with an Indiana Jones fedora on it. Ah the wonders that thing has seen.
Big Smelly Dirt Cock’s missing out.
“You don’t need to dry hump the model to get a close-up.”
No, but it’s certainly a worthwhile pursuit…and a convenient excuse when your schmecken rubs against her leg too often…
Ah I spoke too late.
My apologies, BSDC.
DB I guess its better than just losing your phone behind your bed…
She should be nekkid
DB, I’m copying this from the last, I wanted you to see it:
Spendid, indeed, SupB. And I got a story for you guys. I thought for sure I was going to be arrested when the plane landed. I fell asleep on the plane, which I never do, and when I woke up, there was this fat, black and blue hairy fucking spider dangling from the ceiling four inches from my nose. I yelled and jerked back, elbowing the sleeping South American weirdo chick - who had demonstrated a profound fear of flying upon takeoff - right between the eyes as she slept. She woke up screaming about the same time I swatted the spider away. Everyone on the plane is by now freaking out and looking around and the flight attendant comes running up to see what the hell is going on, and as I try to explain, another woman starts screaming and jumps out of her seat (I had swatted the fucking spider onto her) swatting at herself. By now, it’s almost total pandemonium, with the chick next to me saying “He heet Me! He heet me!” and the other woman screaming and jumping around. The co-pilot had to come out to see WTF was going on…if they hadn’t found that spider smashed on the floor, I’d still be in the airport clink.
Now I really do have a reason not to sleep on planes.
As for that painting, I’d e-tappe that.
headly, that’s hilarious! i miss my home away from home a lot. :(
DD - I could stroke your stomach until you feel better.
Christ knows the girl I want to be fucking is MIA.
damn massive, you totally stole my line i was going to use on brad.
Headly, that’s fucking priceless. I laughed pretty goddamn hard at that story.
“HE HEET ME!” LMFAO!
I would have love to have been in the marketing meeting when the Durden people pitched the banner-add to the Lysol folks.
So the theory is that the lurkers out there are watching us talk about ass to mouth and will suddenly think, “You know, My toilet needs cleaning,” and click through on the Lysol add.
You’re fucking kidding me, Right?
What’s next, selling ad space on (P) rick’s ass?