Lisa Rinna Turning 50 (or 37 on the Plastic Surgery Index)

By Lex March 08, 2013 @ 4:58 PM

Has it really been twenty years since Lisa Rinna was on all those shows that I never watched?

You couldn’t tell from looking at her that she’s turning 50 in a couple months. Even those brand new nipples on her brand new breasts are poking out like she’s a high school cheerleader about to lose her maidenhead to the varsity QB. I imagine you do feel spirited when you get new body parts. Not like the Bionic Man who had to painfully learn to condition his bio body to work with his new super-animatronic parts, but more like how you feel after you remove heavy boots and walk around barefoot, like you got brand new Oscar Pistorious feet.

Photo credit: FameFlyNet / WENN

(9) Comments

  1. avatar
    SomeoneluvsU 03/08/2013 17:18

    Do her tits make that bionic noise when you squeeze them?

    Duck Lips and bat wing arms….
    I’ll pass

  2. avatar
    Lick-it 03/08/2013 17:42

    Does she still have that hairy box…???

    …cause I like those….

  3. avatar
    gkline 03/08/2013 17:49

    Amazing how you completely fuck up an easy-laugh post. “maidenhead”, “spirited”, “Bionic Man”…what are you, like 65, 70 years old? Great post Grandpa!

  4. avatar
    Doo Doo Fresh 03/08/2013 18:04

    I’ll take “what Lindsay Lohan will look like in 20 years” Alex.

  5. avatar
    lat1008 03/08/2013 21:34

    I don’t get it! This makes her sound like she actually looks good.

  6. avatar 03/09/2013 00:57

    I’m 24 and I’ve been reading this page since high school. The attempts at B’s humour are missing whatever the hell he did to make things hilarious instead of, quite frankly, creepy-as-all-fuck, without a single amusing line that I can paste to my Facebook.

    Bookmark deleted. Because fuck you, that’s why.

  7. avatar
    jb766 03/09/2013 03:07

    If you would have left it at the first sentence/question, this would have been hysterical… Sometimes/ Most Times, simplicity is key. A lesson you are taking way too long to learn…

  8. avatar
    Lick-it 03/09/2013 10:50


    ….please hack this site’s password and take over……

  9. avatar
    ThisSiteIsGayPornography 03/09/2013 23:41

    I’d take a silicon BJ and spooge on her tits. I’m married so I have low standards on “stranger” BJs.

You must be to post a comment.