Tara Reid dazzled on the red carpet for the premiere event for Sharknado 4, showing everybody what the biology class skeleton might look like draped in five pounds of near human skin. A couple or three drinks in you'd still fuck the skeleton. Everything turns you on at sixteen. Reid's been on promotional tour for the film desperately trying not to book any promotional appearances before noon. Lit by four. It's a narrow window.
Sharknado 4 ended up with the lowest TV ratings of any film in the tired franchise yet, meaning that SyFy will order five more because they're cheap and even if they progressively lose audience, you can't name a single other SyFy show. Good news for Tara Reid and Ian Ziering inexorably tied to the film series provided they accept payment in cases of off-brand Chinese gum. It's easy to mock Sharknado. It's less easy to admit they've been better than the last nineteen Kevin Hart movies.
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