Cameron Diaz Has A Homeless Woman To Thank

October 24, 2017 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Thank good for poverty. Cameron Diaz has the honesty of some woman down on her luck and without permanent residence to thank for the return of her wallet. 


Cameron Diaz Surrenders

January 6, 2015 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Cameron Diaz married Benji Madden in a super private ceremony out by the second dumpster behind The Tavern in Brentwood. Given that these two have fucked the crap out of most of Hollywood the past fifteen years, they wanted to keep it simple, exchanging rings and vowing not to pursue sex when aware they are […]


Cameron Diaz Gives Up And Gets Engaged To The Chubby Twin From Good Charlotte

December 23, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

It was supposedly very romantic. Benji Madden called Cameron Diaz’s mom and reminded her that her daughter had been forever ruined by A-Rod’s PED encrusted cock. He then asked permission to make Cameron his next super squeeze. When your daughter is forty-two and growing a mustache like a bandito you’re inclined not to ask if […]


Cameron Diaz In Her Underwear

September 18, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Cameron Diaz used to be good looking and act shy and modest and pretend she wasn’t. Now she and her publicity team are pushing really hard to make you believe she’s still that same girl. Even in German, it’s not nearly as enticing. Nobody goes through the A-Rod sex and HGH cocktail ringer and comes […]


Cameron Diaz Bikini Mismatch, That’s Crazy

July 24, 2014 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Cameron Diaz has to suffer through lots of shit she wouldn’t have to if she was a man. People give her grief about not wanting kids. They criticize her body for being paunchy yet masculine. They question her choice of dating the less talented Madden brother who looks like the Sunday morning bouncer at a […]


Cameron Diaz Didn’t Sit on Drew Barrymore’s Face And Shit Around The Web

July 15, 2014 | crap around the web | editor| 0 Comments

After Cameron Diaz made some publicity reference to having been with a woman before, rumors started flying that the woman she had bumped uglies with was Drew Barrymore. Not only does Diaz say she never munched Drew’s sloppy hippy box, but even the idea of that “makes me want to vomit in my mouth.” Agreed. […]


Cameron Diaz In A Bikini

July 8, 2014 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

After dating Bradley Cooper, Alex Rodriguez, Sean Combs, and reports of boning billionaire Elon Musk, Cameron took a good look in the mirror and saw what we all saw, it’s time to start dating the less successful Madden brother. Fuck, it happens to us all at some point. The willingness to pretend the suburban rock […]


Cameron Diaz Don’t Need No Stinking Babies

July 7, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

In this month’s Esquire magazine, Cameron Diaz announced for the tenth time that she doesn’t want to be a mom and instantly became the weeping Jesus on the gas station wall for millions of childless by choice women. These anti-nesters are forever scorned for choosing Italian wine tasting vacations and 2-seat sports cars over the […]


Cameron Diaz Pimps Sex Tape

July 2, 2014 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Cameron Diaz is in the upcoming movie Sex Tape which my shit meter informs me is going to land between horrible and truly fucking horrible. It’s another one of those movies based on a modern social meme that comes out about five years after the meme stopped being fresh or relevant. Paris Hilton’s sex tape […]