Alexandra Daddario Female Lothario and Shit Around the Web

June 26, 2017 | crap around the web | Robert Paulsen| 0 Comments

Brooke Burke yacht yoga, sexy archaeologists, and more!


Jaclyn Swedberg Gets On All Fours for 138 Water

December 18, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

I thought NSA bulk data collection helped to rid the planet of these 138 Water interplanetary soul suckers, but apparently, we traded liberty for zero security as these bastards continue to probe the anii of our domestic lady folk. When the war is over and there’s nothing left but the vendetta trials, girls like Jaclyn […]


Will You Remember the World Before 138 Water?

November 28, 2013 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

That’s not just anybody hoisting the first case of 138 Water, that’s actress Cara Santana who you’ve never heard of. That’s how this 138 conspiracy is going to unfold. Chicks in hats and sunglasses who once appeared in Beverly Hills Chihuahua 3 will be distributing the unholy water contents throughout major urban cities. You drink […]


Jaclyn Swedberg Down to Just Panties for 138 Water

November 20, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

I don’t know what to say at this point. Drink their non-existent water. Don’t drink it. I just want to stare into the ass crack of Jaclyn Swedberg which serves as a Stargate into a parallel universe where bloggers have a ruddy complexion and are successful with the ladies. Though it’s possible that Stargate is […]


Jaclyn Swedberg Falls for the 138 Water Ruse

November 9, 2013 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Here, girl, hold up this bottle and smile. Oh, yes, for sure, this water is going to be the bomb. Everybody will be drinking this stuff in big Hollywood meetings and at fancy Beverly Hills parties. You’re going to be famous. Now stop asking so many questions and show us more tit. Photo Credit: FameFlynet


Playmate Jaclyn Swedberg In A Bikini

September 25, 2013 | bikini | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Where do women learn to pose like this? I can barely manufacture a basic smile for a photograph. I feel awkward and always end up looking like a jackass in a Kinko’s sample brochure. Are these chicks going to some kind of posing camp? Can I get a job there teaching canoeing? Anybody who says […]


Playmate Jaclyn Swedberg Does A Photoshoot On The Beach

September 5, 2013 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Jaclyn Swedberg is the kind of girl at a party who every guy lies to about what he does. For instance, instead of semi-employed blogger and bottle recycler, I’d tell her I’m an animal trainer. And when she asks me what kind of animals, I’ll blurt out that I want to have sex with her […]