I don't get why Bruno can't show me some sexy moves without people videotaping it and plastering it all over the internet.
03.09.2007 borat? really?
The much talked American Idol season finale will be more than just the final episode where the winner is reveled, it will be a ambitious poverty-relief campaign, with guest performances by Gwen Stefani, Josh Groban, Pink, Michael Bubl, Annie Lennox, Il Divo and Borat. MTV.com says:
The April 24-25 episodes are aimed at raising awareness and funds for poverty-relief organizations helping children in the United States and Africa. The first night will find the top six finalists on the show singing "life anthems" about hope and compassion, with show sponsors Coke and AT&T donating money to charity for every vote cast via phone or text message. The next night's show will feature the celebrity lineup, which was put together by "Idol" judge Simon Cowell. The money raised from the special programs will be split between organizations including the U.S. Fund for UNICEF, the Global Fund, Save the Children, Nothing but Nets and Malaria No More. In the United States, the money will be focused on organizations that deliver programs to some of the country's most disadvantaged children, while in Africa, funds will be used to provide health and education programs.
Wow. That shit sounds depressing. Honestly, the only way I would watch this nonsense is if it was projected onto Marissa Millers naked ass.
11.28.2006 borat was the last straw
So what would force Pam Anderson to divorce Kid Rock after just three months of marriage? Borat, of course. Or at least Pam’s role in the Borat movie, which Kid saw for the first time when a private screening has held for Kid, Pam and some friends two weeks ago. A friend tells Page Six:
"Bob (Kid Rock) started screaming at Pam, saying she had humiliated herself and telling her, 'You're nothing but a whore! You're a slut! How could you do that movie?' - in front of everyone. It was very embarrassing. Pam thought he could have a sense of humor about the movie. She was in on the gag from the very beginning and loved doing the movie. And on the eve of what was supposed to be a very positive thing, he made it an awful night. Ever since, it has been icicles between them. Bob is just a very unhappy and angry man. Pam is very disenchanted and sad. You know, there are reasons why she never married him before. Those reasons disappeared while they were together on a boat in St. Tropez, but she knows now that they never went away. The reality is he is an insecure, angry man."
Um, really. The star of 'Joe Dirt' and 'Biker Boyz' is looking down on Pam because of her movie choices? And did it really take the Borat movie for Bob to realize that Pam is a slut? It's Pam Anderson. Pam doing something slutty is like a badger being mean or Jesus flying through the clouds and saving people. That's just what they do. Pam's been a slut for like 20 years now. If you showed me a picture of her with her legs spread, you'd have to include a football next to it for scale.
11.06.2006 the real borat is confused
After the Borat movie made $26.4 million in its debut this weekend - putting it in a position to become the most successful comedy of all time - the man often thought to be the inspiration for Borat is wondering why he's been left out. Mahir Cagri, the Turkish reporter who bears an uncanny resemblance to Sacha Baron Cohen's character, became an internet sensation in the late 90's with his amateurish, picture heavy website, complete with candids of him playing ping pong and tanning in a thong. Random phrases in broken English litter the site, including, "I like to take foto-camera (amimals , towns, nice nude models and peoples)…" and "I like sex" and of course the always awesome, "My eyes green … I live alone !!!!!!!!!"
"All people know Sacha Baron Cohen imitate only me. He is stealing my character and giving bad message to USA people. He [Cohen] never contacted me or got my permission … If possible you can help me too for stop this or find good lawyer?”
Yikes. I totally forgot about this guy. There hasn’t been a rip off this bad since they blatantly stole my life story for the movie "Ong-bak". They stole my villages elephant statue, and now me and my muay thai are gonna get it back!
(you can find a mirror for the real Borats website here)
10.19.2006 the kazakh foreign minister isnt helping
Although they have threatened him with legal action in the past and met with President Bush to discuss his antics, Borat - the fictional reporter from Kazakhstan played by Brit comedian Sacha Barron Cohen - has been invited by the government of Kazakhstan on an official state visit. Rakhat Aliyev, the Kazakh first deputy foreign minister and a powerful son-in-law of President Nursultan Nazarbayev, extended the olive branch. Aliyev said:
"His trip could yield a lot of discoveries — that women not only travel inside buses but also drive their own cars, that we make wine from grapes, that Jews can freely attend synagogues and so on."
Inside the busses! Wine from grapes! And so on! Well, this changes everything! I had no idea it was such a cosmopolitan paradise. Like London in the 1960’s, only with swastikas and the Black Death. ASTANA - CITY ON THE GO!!!
(stick with this deleted scene from the movie, i promise it gets funny by the end)
10.18.2006 borat was right
The Kazakhstan government gets really annoyed because Borat, the fictional reporter from Kazakhstan created by comedian Sacha Baron Cohen, portrays the country as backwards and something less than smart. The kind of country that would spell “bank” wrong on its own money. Oh, hey, guess what:
The Kazakhstan central bank has misspelled the word “bank” on its new notes, officials said Wednesday. The bank plans to put the misprinted notes — worth 2,000 tenge ($15) and 5,000-tenge — into circulation in November and then gradually withdraw them to correct the spelling.
It's kinda awesome that the bank had to announce that they misspelled "bank". It has to be a good feeling knowing that your national bank doesn't really sweat the details. "10, 20, whatever, it's practically the same". If this country packed your parachute, you'd pull the rip chord and firewood would come out. And your only hope would be to aim for someone fat and hope you can bounce.
