“After some long … hard … thoughts … I’ve decided it’s time for me to let go of my mistress American Idol before she boils my rabbit. I strayed from my first love, Aerosmith, and I’m back — but instead of begging on my hands and knees, I’ve got two fists in the air and I’m kicking the door open with my band.”
Meanwhile, Randy Jackson is laying low, screening phone calls from Fox, and hoping no one remembers to deactivate his key card.
They say that the national anthem is one of the hardest songs to sing, and yesterday at the AFC Championship game between New England and Baltimore Steven Tyler proved them right. He better watch out. Ray Lewis has stabbed people for less.
Steven Tyler did a telephone interview on the Today show this morning to explain that the accident which left him with a black eye and broken tooth had nothing to do with any sort of drug relapse, and everything to do with the fact that food in other countries is essentially legal poison.
The incident occurred on Tuesday, when Tyler says he walked into his hotel shower in Paraguay, “got nauseous (from food poisoning), started to get sick and I fell on my face and I just passed out.”
But this was not a fall off of the wagon, says Tyler, who relapsed from decades of sobriety in late 2009 and underwent three months of rehab. “That’s not the issue,” he told Lauer.
“It’s nothing I don’t understand. It makes me a little upset. But I get that people think that. It’s something that bothers me and it’s something I’ll have to deal with for the rest of my life.”
I bet when he saw Tyler explaining that he got a black eye simply because he had an accident and fell down, Chris Brown mumbled to himself, “see, was that so hard.”
‘American Idol’ officially announced Henniffa Yopez and Steven Tyler as their two new judges this afternoon, with Ryan Seacrest on the ‘Idol’ stage hosting a big announcement show, and Holy Shit is this thing boring. I starting watching it to see Lopez get announced, but then it dawned on me what I was doing and I stopped.
Last week in Jones Beach, New York, Aerosmith lead singer Steven Tyler whacked guitarist Joe Perry in the head with a microphone (video above), and Tuesday night in Toronto, Perry pushed Tyler off the stage (video here), so it’s probably for the best that Tyler has officially signed to be a judge on American Idol next year before they kill each other. E! says…
While Fox officially says “no comment,” a very-inside music source confirms the flamboyant Aerosmith singer finalized negotiations late last week and is officially signed on to be a judge on the 10th season of American Idol.
They also say Jennifaa Yopez isn’t completely out of the running as the third judge, but that delusional bitch was demanding 20 million a year plus she wanted Fox to pay for her the army of assistants and hair and makeup experts. She typically spends 8 grand a day just on makeup. “She costs too much money and doesn’t sell enough,” one person said, and that was back in 2007 when she was relatively popular. These days one of her concerts would be so barren and deserted that Survivorman guy could film a show there.
AVRIL LAVIGNE – went swimming in Malibu yesterday and for a second her top slipped down a little (NSFW version here). If you can’t open the picture right now, just imagine someone took Grovers nose and put it on a dry erase board. Except not that sexy. (the sun)
LADY GAGA – does cocaine a couple of times a year but doesn’t condone it or think her fans should emulate her. She does want them to continue having terrible taste in music though. (us)
AMERICAN IDOL – offered Steven Tyler the final spot as a judge and he’s “probably” going to take it. Tyler of course is the singer and founding member of Aerosmith, who has 4 Grammys, 21 top 40 songs, is the best-selling American band ever (150 million albums), and has the most gold and multi-platinum albums by an American band ever. Still, when it comes to music, I’d like to hear what Randy Jackson has to say. (people)
MONTANA FISHBURNE – has sex in a car, a hotel room and at the mall in her first porn movie, out on August 18th. Maybe for the sequel she can have sex at her dads funeral on August 19th. (vivid)