Gwyneth Paltrow, Woman, Shall Never Compete With Other Women

Gwyneth Paltrow attended a Bumble app related event that encourages women to work together and network as if gossiping and backstabbing weren’t embedded in most women’s DNA. Has no one seen that show Bad Girls Club? Reality TV based on common occurrences. read more

Ruby Rose Hates All Haters

Ruby Rose went from looking like the Backstreet Boy that never was to Christopher Walken in a sequin dress after skipping a week’s worth of meals. And just like every other woman on this planet she’s upset over mean things people are saying about her appearance and... read more

Ariel Winter Wishes To Be Wed

Everyday Ariel pushes the boundary of how else can the community of internet trolls come up with new ways to body shame the behemoth with big tatas. Being mean to a butterface on the Internet gets exhausting.  read more

Brandi Glanville, Mother of the Year

Siblings can be pretty simple minded sometimes. Who cares about a bed time when your older sister needs a picture with Brandi Glanville for social media, a closet shrine, or however she chooses to worship women who are more beautiful and famous. read more

Body Shamed Brooke Hogan Not Backing Down

Most people who get made fun of don’t have millions dollars to wipe away their tears. That fact didn’t stop Brooke Hogan from crying about being body shamed and incorrectly labeled a transexual.  read more

Keegan Michael Key Upgrades His Woman

Keegan Michael Key is the perfect example of why you shouldn’t be with someone who makes you happy with a great personality. Because being an attractive ex is the only thing that makes alimony payments a little easier. read more

Mike Tyson Unsuccessful At Sneaking In To Chile

The last time I remembered that Chile existed it was because I watching Locked Up Abroad. I try to avoid traveling to places that can have all of their interesting attributes highlighted in less than a half hour on National Geographic. read more

Blac Chyna Suing Kim Kardashian

An enemy of my enemy is my friend. I’ve been waiting for someone to dethrone the dynasty that Kris comprised by putting a price tag on anything with tits in her house. Including Rob. read more

'What Men Want' Gets Feminist Reboot

What better way to celebrate a recent win over the patriarchy than to replicate your oppressor's behavior and objectify men. Did we not learn anything from Animal Farm in third grade?  read more

"Get Out" Laughing All The Way to the Bank

Studios have submitted dramas with comedic overtones to the comedy category before. Maybe the categories need to be a little more fluid like gender in 2017 because who doesn't want to watch a 10 hour award show. read more

Christian Slater and the Case of See You Next Tuesdays

Christian Slater’s preferred hobbies include playing Rami Malek’s dead dad on Mr. Robot and calling London located editors of The Daily Beast “salacious cunts.” Toxic masculinity is a sensitive subject right now.  read more

Sandra Lee Thankful For Her Sucky Childhood

Poor people sure do brag a bunch once their bank account allows them to eat food they didn’t have to dumpster dive for. read more