George Clooney Picked A Terrible Way To Attempt Suicide

July 13, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

There’s no better way to shit on your legacy than by attempting to off yourself by driving recklessly on a scooter. Sure, George Clooney will deny suicide was on his mind at the time but anyone doing 60 on... READ MORE

The Clooneys Are Beyond Adorable

December 14, 2017 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

George Clooney and Amal Clooney considerately passed out headphones to passengers on their flight to London, along with a note pre-apologizing in case their six month old twins cried.


Female George Clooney Cries Four Times A Day

September 21, 2017 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

George Clooney has proudly come out as a biological female after proclaiming that he cries four times a day over the pressures of motherhood. What does having a vagina feel like George? The fifty-six-year-old actor and thirty-nine-year-old Amal Clooney mashed fluids... READ MORE

Amal Clooney Battling War Criminals and Looking Fabulous

March 13, 2017 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Amal Clooney has been showcasing the plight of Iraqi people pillaged by ISIS marauders at the UN this week, while simultaneously producing a fashion show of $250,000 worth of maternity couture. Here's a hint, you're not supposed to comment... READ MORE

Clooney Having Batched Babies

February 10, 2017 | celebrity | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

While it is indeed troubling that the patriarch of the Duggar family full of child molesters will someday soon have two hundred grand children, let's not negate the fact that women unable to naturally conceive are being pumped full... READ MORE



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