Lindsay just got paid

Apparently casinos in Vegas have mountains of money that they can't give away fast enough, so even dullards like Lindsay Lohan can make 70 grand for a 5 hour appearance. The New York Post says... Lindsay Lohan's 23rd birthday isn't until tomorrow, but she's already... read more

Michael really loved drugs

Michael Jackson was so stuffed with drugs when he died last Thursday he probably would have rattled if you shook him, but as far as what actually killed him, police are now narrowing their focus to a drug called Propofol. It's a sedative so powerful that it's wildly... read more

"I'm a workaholic."

Not that it would make any more sense, but it really feels like these quotes are old. Nonetheless, various outlets are reporting today that, in a new interview with the British version of OK magazine, Lindsay Lohan says she's the hardest working person she knows. Oh but... read more

Simon Cowell will make 144m

144 million dollars per season. 144 million. Dollars. One hundred. And forty-four. Million. Dollars. Per season. Which is five months long. 144 million dollars for five months. Five months. One hundred and forty-four million dollars to judge "American Idol". For five... read more

This is the real father

TMZ says now that Michael Jackson was not the biological father of any of his kids, but Us trumps that by claiming they know who the real father is. Arnold Klein, the handsome and presumably stoned devil in the picture above, was Jackson's dermatologist and the boss of... read more

Where did Christian Bale go?

Remember Christian Bale? He was in the Batman movies, and Terminator 4? And after that he was in talks to star opposite Johnny Depp in "Public Enemies"? And those talks were successful and he took the part and filmed the movie and it was a really big deal? Well you'd... read more

200 million to split up

Seemingly every Michael Jackson story for the past five years has mentioned that he's broke as hell, but the Wall Street Journal says today there will still be hundreds of millions to divide, even after his debt is cleared. So everyone in Michael's final will please... read more

Joe Jackson is devastated

Michaels father Joe Jackson held a press conference with the Rev. Al Sharpton today, and it was every bit the understated and dignified affair as that made it sound. Is that a giant purple gorilla behind them? You know it brother. Fox News says... "After plugging his... read more

You stay classy OK! magazine

The English version of OK! magazine hits today with what they say are the last pictures of Michael Jackson. At first that makes you feel dirty, but then you see they wrote "with all our love and prayers", in all caps, next to the picture of him dead. I thought that was... read more

112 pounds, bald, and disfigured

The Sun has somehow gotten a copy of the coroners initial report after his examination of Michael Jackson on Friday, and the results are shocking. Wait, no. No actually this sounds about right. The Sun says... "...the singer was a virtual skeleton — barely eating and... read more

Kendra got married

Kendra Wilkinson married Philadelphia Eagle wide-receiver Hank Baskett this weekend at the Playboy Mansion in LA, and even though these aren't official wedding photos, they really came out beautifully. Especially this one. I can't explain why that one is so special, but... read more

Victims should not be mocked

I suppose it's possible that Megan Fox will let you bang her in the ass before midnight tonight, but short of that the most awesome thing that will happen to you all day is when you hear Opie and Anthony (official site here) and the great Patrice O'Neal listen to a now... read more