the oscars were almost enjoyable

By brendon February 19, 2010 @ 11:13 AM

Steve Martin actually did a good job when he hosted the Oscars in 2001 and 2003, and although Alec Baldwin is a dirty god damn hippie, he’s a tremendous actor and entertaining guy. So together they should be fine when they co-host the Academy Awards on March 7th. But the new producers of this years show told NPR this morning that their first choice for a host was Sacha Baron Cohen.

But it was not to be. When they told the Academy, they “swatted it down,” Shankman said. “They thought it was too big of a wild card. They thought it was just too unpredictable.”

Yeah god forbid the Academy Awards be unpredictable. In other words entertaining. What did they really think he was gonna do, bring a pony on stage and slaughter it? Then chew on it’s bones and swim in it’s blood? And even if he did, the kids watching need to grow up someday. Oh stop crying. This is real life.

Tags: alec baldwin, sasha baron cohen, steve martin |

43 Comments

friday morning headlines

By brendon February 12, 2010 @ 12:02 PM

ANGELINA JOLIE - has no plans to adopt another child while in Haiti this week. They should get her drunk. Girls tend to be much more receptive to new ideas once they’re good and drunk. (cnn)

INGLORIOUS BASTERDS - is closing the gap on ‘Hurt Locker’ and ‘Avatar’ and is now a legit threat to win the Oscar for Best Picture. Who would have guessed that a movie depicting Jews as ferocious men of action would be so well received in Hollywood? (la times and la times)

ALICE EVE - Her new movie has some ecards for Valentines Day, but even better is that the ad now has shameless closeups of her amazing chest, exactly as I suggested two weeks ago. I should be a Hollywood movie executive. I saw her huge tits and thought, “Hmm. If only there was some way to convey to the audience that she has huge tits, but how?” (ecards)

ALEC BALDWIN - attacked a photographer as he left the hospital yesterday and had to be restrained by police. It was either because the photographer was crowding Baldwin, or because he’s fat and the photographer was dressed like a pint of ice cream. “NOM NOM NOM”, Baldwin said. (daily news, inf)

8 photos in gallery >

Tags: alec baldwin, alice eve, angelina jolie, headlines, inglorious basterds |

54 Comments

ireland baldwin has gotten her revenge

By brendon February 11, 2010 @ 1:59 PM

America first met Alec Baldwins daughter Ireland (who is 13 in these pictures from last year, btw) in 2008 when he left a message on her phone calling her a “rude, thoughtless little pig”, among other things. And since women are black-hearted monsters, she’s probably been plotting her revenge ever since. And now she’s gotten it, and she used a phone as her weapon just to tack on an ironic twist. NBC says…

Alec Baldwin was rushed to a Manhattan hospital overnight after a caller believed to be his daughter dialed 911 to say she couldn’t rouse the actor.
When medics got to Baldwin’s Upper West Side apartment, he agreed to go to the hospital where he was treated and released after about an hour.
Sources said it was Baldwin’s daughter with ex-wife Kim Basinger, Ireland, who made the call, telling an operator Baldwin was unresponsive.
The 911 caller expressed concern that the actor was not responding and speculated about his possibly taking pills.

I don’t think the cops should be able to take you away and have you examined just because one person made a phone call claiming you were gonna kill yourself. Maybe that person had no intention of really killing themselves and was just saying it to get attention. Maybe the person who said that doesn’t wanna break up and swears things will be different this time. Did you ever think of that Megan?

(picture source = getty images)

7 photos in gallery >

Tags: alec baldwin, ireland baldwin, kim bassinger |

61 Comments

monday afternoon headlines

By brendon November 30, 2009 @ 6:43 PM

NICK HOGAN – is mostly famous for driving like an reckless asshole, and Saturday night he “was involved in a minor car accident in Los Angeles.” No one was hurt and no police reports were taken, so no specifics are known, but maybe a little torture will loosen his tongue. (the ap)

ALEC BALDWIN – is retiring from Hollywood. In about three years. “I don’t have any interest in acting anymore. Movies are part of my past. It’s been 30 years. I’m not young, but I have time to do something else.” Some are saying he could have a second career in politics. His only hurdle will be that he has no idea what the fuck he’s talking about. (e! online)

JAKE GYLLENHAAL – has not broken up with Reese Witherspoon, despite the rumor this weekend that he had. I was sitting at a red light and saw Jake standing there, so I rolled down my window and asked him for a comment, but all he said was, “hey man wanna party?” Then he pushed his tongue against his cheek and made a handjob gesture. No sir I do not “wanna party”, thank you very much! (access hollywood)

EMMA WATSON – was in Jamaica this weekend, and to be honest Hermione didn’t look very happy. Hopefully me hitting on her and telling her, “she’s cast a spell on my magic wand” will cheer her up, because I was planning on doing that anyway. (splash news online)

11 photos in gallery >

Tags: alec baldwin, emma watson, headlines, jake gyllenhaal, nick hogan |

62 Comments

ALEC BALDWIN IS DELIGHTFUL

By brendon July 22, 2008 @ 8:11 AM

The reason you hear so many stories about Alec Baldwin being a short-tempered maniac is because Alec Baldwin is short-tempered maniac. As the New York Daily News points out yet again today.

Alec Baldwin turned down Larry King and other interviewers because he wanted to talk first with Diane Sawyer about his divorce memoir, "A Promise to Ourselves." But the "30 Rock" star is said to have turned testy when Sawyer had to reschedule because of husband Mike Nichols' heart surgery.
"Diane's people couldn't believe how angry Baldwin got," says a source. "She was running back from the hospital!" A friend of Baldwin says, "The interview was rescheduled at least four times. Then the air conditioning wasn't working. Alec was a little annoyed, but not with Diane."

It's no wonder Alec Baldwin is so testy. He's been driven to the brink of madness but his lifetime of success and million dollar paychecks. It's really quite heartbreaking.

Tags: alec baldwin |

34 Comments

EVERYONE HATES ACTORS. THIS IS WHY.

By brendon July 08, 2008 @ 9:05 AM

As his daughter can attest, Alec Baldwin is a jackass. He’s a really good actor but his career isn’t what it could have been because he’s such a jerkoff. Now a movie, based on the Hollywood tell-all "What Just Happened" by Art Linson (producer of Fight Club, The Untouchables, etc.) will give people an idea of what that looks like. Aint It Cool says…

The particulars: Baldwin shows up to the set of THE EDGE sporting a full beard, which he deems appropriate for his character; the studio, already cheesed at shelling out $5 million for a non-bankable "star", flips and demands that he shave; Linson, facing the possibility of replacing Baldwin with the less physically intimidating Bill Pullman (hot off of ID4 at the time), girds for war and, roughly, the following blow-up occurs.

I think I need to rewatch that. Does he want to keep the beard? It didn't really say.