Kate Middleton is suing over these blurry topless pictures

By brendon September 14, 2012 @ 2:07 PM

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People think the Royal Family is all stuffy and dull, but first there were pictures of Prince Harry partying naked in Vegas, and today the French magazine Closer published pictures taken last week showing Kate Middleton laying out topless with Prince William at a chateau in France.

Needless to say the Royal Family is furious, and quickly filed a lawsuit saying, “legal proceedings for breach of privacy have been commenced today in France.” Not only that, but the Queen has 50 fighting ships sailing up the Iberian peninsula, and 3000 heavy cavalry with orders to pillage Baugé, Rouen, and La Rochelle. Which I don’t think she’s even allowed to do.

(direct link to the blurry but still NSFW scans here and here and here)

afternoon headlines, with naked Brooke Hogan

By brendon August 21, 2012 @ 5:30 PM

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TONY SCOTT – had his suicide filmed by several people who are trying to sell the footage. Inspiring “I Believe I Can Fly” song, not included. (guardian)

JOHNNY DEPP – is being offered $95 million to star in ‘Pirates Of The Caribbean 5′, because ‘Pirates Of The Caribbean 4′ made $1.04 billion. Clearly Lindsay hasn’t figured out that these are about a bisexual drunk who steals or else she would have sued by now. (the sun)

MICHAEL J. FOX – will return to NBC in a sitcom guaranteed to air at least one full season of 22 episodes, even though it hasn’t filmed a pilot yet and NBC hasn’t seen any footage. It’s a very shaky deal, so to speak. (vulture)

RYAN LOCHTE – is in a “three-way tie” to become the next Bachelor on ABC. When things started he was actually the leader, but the other two guys are French and he let them catch up because he’s an asshole. (e!)

BROOKE HOGAN – has a “I’d rather go naked…” ad for the reprehensible PETA, and you can actually see her boob in this. Are they implying I shouldn’t want Brooke Hogan locked in a cage? Because they are way way off in that assumption. (direct link to the NSFW picture here)

Kelly Brook is in lingerie

By brendon August 21, 2012 @ 4:06 PM

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I’ve never heard of New Look lingerie, so they fixed the hell out of that by taking pictures of Kelly Brook in a push-up bra. These pictures are so great that when I got to the end I was very sad and started to cry, and then my mom took me to Dairy Queen and got me a blizzard to cheer me up.

those arent Jordan Carvers eyes “Johnny Depp”

By brendon August 07, 2012 @ 3:22 PM

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If you’re making a movie about Johnny Depp, but can only afford Johnny Depps non-union Mexican equivalent (presumably named Juanny Depp), it would be a good idea to have him stand next to a skinny girl with huge tits in a bikini so maybe people won’t notice. And so that’s what the producers of ‘Who Killed Johnny’ did. If she has sex with him I’ll fucking die, by the way.

(image source = bauer griffin)

Sharon Stone wore a see-through shirt

By brendon June 29, 2012 @ 8:55 AM

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Sharon Stone, who is 54, wore this see-through shirt to the anfAR Inspiration Night in Paris last night, but didn’t wear a bra, because those are for prudes.

That’s “AmfAR“, as in, “I’m glad I amfar enough away that I didn’t have to pretend like I wasn’t staring at 54-year-olds surprisingly nice tits at a party last night.”

(image source = inf)

Madonna flashed her boob

By brendon June 11, 2012 @ 10:50 AM

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Madonna, who turns 54 this summer, took her MDNA tour to Istanbul over the weekend, and mistaking the crowds polite enthusiasm for geriatric lust, she ruthlessly flashed her tit at them. If pure morbid curiosity forces you to watch the NSFW video, it takes less than 30 seconds before you’re haunted by the anguished screams of the audience as they cry out in horror.

If you don’t have the gag reflex for that, I made some screencaps (also NSFW, starting here). See the nauseous look on her face in the headline? Well just open the pictures in front of a mirror if you’d like to see it again.

(image source = inf)

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