The timeline for last night seems to be that Paris Hilton broke up with Greg (aka, “Doug”) Reinhardt, then hit some clubs, then about two hours later she went home with international soccer star Cristiano Ronaldo. She’s nothing if not resilient.
They both went to MyHouse last night and left at around 3 AM for a Ron-dezvous at Nicky Hilton’s pad, according to X17. Cristiano left at around 5 AM
Um, so I don’t actually care about Paris Hilton or the list of victims her poisoned womb is attacking, but I very much do care about hot Asian girls who are mostly naked. In honor of that, hey look, it’s Jamie Chung. The last 4 pictures were in a magazine but the first three have never been seen before. Big deal photographer Randall Slavin (more from him here and here) took them for Maxim. Ronaldo should have put the moves on Jamie instead. Why Paris? You might as well fuck a garbage can. Her vagina has just as much room and disease, but at least the garbage can won’t make you listen to it’s crappy record.
Soccer superstar Cristiano Ronaldo obliterated his $300,000 Ferrari early this morning after losing control in a two-lane tunnel near Manchester Airport. No other cars were involved and no one was hurt, including Ronaldo, who somehow walked away without a scratch and even practiced with his team just a few hours later. The Sun says…
Ronaldo was travelling through a two-lane tunnel at Manchester Airport when he hit the wall – sending parts of the barrier flying across the dual carriageway.
Ronaldo was able to get out of the vehicle himself and was spoken to by police at the scene after the smash at 10.20am.
A witness said: "The front of Ronaldo's car was completely mangled. There was metal all over the road and debris - and we had to dodge our way through it. Ronaldo was just standing at the side of the road looking forlorn and bewildered.”
Oh this poor man. I just hope he can find some solace tonight when he rolls around in piles of money with many many beautiful ladies. That’s what I would do if I needed some cheering up. Sort of. Not exactly that, but like, the other day, my crushing loneliness got the best of me and I followed two girls around a Vons for like 20 minutes, then when they asked me what I thought I was doing, I said, "umm, yeah, that’s what she said." Then I said, "Yeeaahhh, Up top" and stuck up my hand for a high five from the guy behind me in line, who unfortunately didn’t seem to know what I was doing.
Cristiano Ronaldo is maybe the world’s most famous soccer player, meaning he’s probably the most person in the world, and no one in America gives a shit. Here he is in Italy yesterday vacationing with his insanely hot Spanish girlfriend. If you want you can go over to Splash and see more of these. Or don’t, whatever. It's your life, man.
