Bieber Faces the Music

Justin Bieber is facing his haters with love and a shitload of attorneys. The twink pop star has chosen tostand trial for his DUI arrest in Miami. The prosecutors had offered the diminutive Canadian a plea deal where he'd get off with standard celebrity justice:... read more

Georgia Pre-Hates Bieber

It looks like Atlanta doesn't want Justin Bieber living in their fair burgh. The residents of Atlanta's ritzy Buckhead neighborhood dropped their umbrella'd cocktails in horror when it was reported that the Canadian flea was looking at properties in the area. It seems... read more

Is Bieber Heading To The ATL?

Justin Bieber is reportedly looking for houses in Atlanta, GA. The tiny tyke has been seen searching for manors in the more desirable parts of the Southern metropolis. Hotlanta has long been considered a mecca for hip hop bad boys with a love of drinking cough syrup... read more

Justin Bieber Changes His Name To Bizzle

The famous Canadian lesbian not named kd Lang has changed his name to Bizzle on Instagram. In the grandiose tradition of Diddy, Prince, and Baby Doc Duvalier, Bieber wants to be known by a cool nickname. Bizzle came to mind.He's probably doing it to distract us all from... read more

New Bieber Egging Video Emerges

A new video has emerged in which you can hear Bieber during the now infamous egging on his neighbor's house. The incident occurred a while back when Bieber and his loser buddies pelted his neighbor's house with eggs supposedlycausing $20,000 worth of damage. You can't... read more

Bieber Hotboxed an Entire Plane

Justin Bieber hotboxed his way to the Super Bowl last week on a private jet. The little lesbian ferret rented a Gulfstream jet to take his posse of Misfit Toys, his lovely dad, and a whole lot of weed from Toronto to New Jersey. The plane was so full of marijuana smoke... read more

Justin Bieber Popped Selena Gomez's Cherry

According to the world's tiniest recording star, he was the veryfirst to boldly go in Selena Gomez's sacred vagina hole. Justin Bieber was apparently boasting about this feat recently to his posse of Misfit Toys. The deed was done back in 2011 when the two 5'3" teen... read more

Justin Bieber And His Little Buddy Share A Suckle

Lesbian teen minstrel, Justin Bieber, and his equally diminutive drag racing buddy, Khalil Amir Sharieff, shared a stripper's fake tits in an L.A. recording studio. I guess Bieber was feeling pretty manic after laying down some legendary audio tracks so he ordered up a... read more

Rob Ford Defends Justin Bieber

Toronto's crack smoking and vagina diving mayor Rob Ford defended Justin Bieber on a morning radio show. Ford, who was stripped of a lot of his powers as mayor of Toronto for hitting the pipe and drinking more than even most Canadians, was on the Sports Junkies show in... read more

Justin Bieber's Toxicology Report Is In

Bieber's toxicology report is in for his DUI bust and it is not going to help his case. The 60-inch long crooning turd was arrested last week for a DUI and drag racing in Miami beach. There were rumors that he wasn't actually impaired and that the cops just busted him... read more

Justin Bieber's Swaggy Jail Tour Continues

It's getting pretty hard to keep track of Justin Bieber's police troubles, between his DUI and drag racing arrest in Miami and the Police Squad episode that features the LAPD building a case against Bieber for egging his house, but we can now add assault charges in... read more

Obama To Address Justin Bieber Deportation

I can't remember all the shit Obama promised as President. Just last night he promised a ton more shit. I believe I'm supposed to get laid more often and look a hint less like a beagle. I know Obama promised more openness and access for the Average Joe who can't pay... read more