Money Doesn’t Buy Happiness, But It Can Buy Protection From Natural Disaster

November 15, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

After watching American Horror Story Apocalypse it really set in just how fucked I am should a devastating catastrophe strike. I doubt Geico home insurance includes a full coverage stay at an underground outpost bunker if a nuclear missile... READ MORE

Kim K Requires Snack Breaks During Sex

November 10, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

I can think of a few things I rather experience more than news of more spilled tea concerning Kim Kardashian’s sex life. Things like getting my hands on a full bottle of Chrissy Teigen’s breast milk for my morning... READ MORE

Bon Jovi Tears Kim K A New One

November 1, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

I’d imagine the descent into depravity that crowned Kim Kardashian as the whore of Hollywood, the same one the bible warned everyone about, probably looks something similar to the seven circles of hell from Dante’s Inferno. The only thing... READ MORE

Let’s All Cross Fingers And Wish The Kanye Show Get’s Cancelled Soon

October 31, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Kanye West has chosen to continue the narrative that black people are pawns and believes persuading them to pick a new preferred political party is as easy as printing t-shirts. And that type of thinking, ladies and gentlemen, is... READ MORE

Kim Hates Her Huge Backside

September 13, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Kim is allegedly uncomfortable with her rump. Me too. I can’t fathom what would trigger such an epiphany? Maybe she grew tired of her excess tush touching the floor every time she parked it on a normal toilet not... READ MORE

Kim K Doesn’t Have Time To Try On Her Own Clothes

September 11, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

I thought Kendall Jenner had it rough when she actually had to go through the tedious task of putting on clothing before receiving a paycheck. Kim Kardashian has it way worse. She actually has to have other women with... READ MORE

Kim K Wears Underwear Older Than Her Sibling

August 26, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

My initial thought when I ponder over the idea of 21-year-old womens underwear is what the smell on that thing must be like. My guess is a mixture of moth balls from being forgotten for so long in an... READ MORE

Kanye Showing His True Hue; Wants Sex From Kim’s Sisters

August 20, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Incessantly referring to yourself in third person and marrying a gypsy that swindled her way the top doesn’t make you a genius, but don’t tell Kanye West that. Kim is upset with her husband after finding out he wants... READ MORE

Kathy Griffin Survived Backlash With The Help Of Kardashians

August 14, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

Kathy Griffen may not be the most intelligent, most beautiful, or funniest woman around town, but she knows how to survive. And whose survival techniques are better to emulate than that of the human cockroaches known as the Kardashians.... READ MORE

Caitlyn Jenner Forsaken By Trans Community And Kardashians In New Interview

May 24, 2018 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

The sassy starlet chatted it up with something called Broadly - which we can assume is a publication dedicated to women with huge broad linebacker shoulders - and opened up about how everyone inexplicably hates her. How could this... READ MORE