DAVID LETTERMAN - is denying a report in the Enquirer that his wife has thrown him out of the house as a result of the affairs he admitted to last month. If she does try to kick him out, he should give her a book about Scott Peterson. Remind her what’s up. (wonderwall)
NICOLE RICHIE - is married to Joel Madden, and has been for some time although no one knew it until today. Probably because no one gives a shit. (radar)
GIRLS KISSING - will never ever get old. At least until I die, and even then it will depend on where their hands are and if they’re using tongue or not. (college humor)
JANET JACKSON - holds Dr. Conrad Murray responsible for her brothers death because Murray gave Michael a powerful anesthetic shortly before he died. In an interview that will air Wednesday, she also says she thinks about him everyday. Especially last week when she raped a little boy. (popeater)
ELIZA DUSHKU - is sexy as hell, as you can see in some recent twitter pictures and by the thong she flashed while preparing for a bike ride with bf Rick Fox. He’s 6’7”, btw, and she’s 5’5”, so Eliza must be pretty easily relaxed. I’m 6’5” and I dated a girl who is 5’3”. During sex she looked like a unicorn.
CUTE COLLEGE GIRL - some of the girls on the “cute girl” page will have one or two good pictures but that’s about it. Nikki on the other hand gets hotter and hotter with every new picture. In fact I’m trying to find a state that will let me marry this one. (college humor)
MILEY CYRUS - has been named the Worst Celebrity Influence by teen girls in an AOL poll. In fact she ran away with it, taking 42 percent of the vote. Britney was second with 27 percent. Selena Gomez was named the Best Celebrity Influence, and in a related story, Selena had 5 new pedophile laws named after her this week. (nbc)
MICHAEL JACKSON - might haunt you from the grave because a picture taken of him during his autopsy may be made public soon. Although it seems hard to believe these will be any worse than every other picture taken of him since 2002. (pop eater)
STEPHANIE PRATT - was officially charged with her DUI today. 10 days ago she was arrested for a .09 BAL. The legal limit is .08. They’re being tough on her as part of the DAs plan to randomly enforce laws. This way makes it more exciting! (wonderwall)
ALESSANDRA AMBROSIO - changed bikinis from before. This new one is sort of a green color. You can be sure that Tyler will stay on top of this story and report new developments as they happen. Now back to you in the studio, Ken. (source = fame)
The Michael Jackson movie ‘This is It’ is getting really good reviews (80 percent on rotten tomatoes) but the big star of the movies LA premiere yesterday was Katy Perry and her tits. The movie of course is both a biography of Jackson and footage of him preparing for his big comeback show in London. I know what you’re thinking: “wow, a biography AND rehearsal footage of singing and dancing?!?!” I know right! It’s like they made this movie just for me!
(image source = flynet and getty and wenn)
‘This Is It’ is the new song from Michael Jackson that leaked online over the weekend, and by all accounts it will be a huge hit for Jackson but also for Paul Anka. Because he’s the one Jackson stole the song from.
Anka tells TMZ in 1983, he wrote a song with Jackson called “I Never Heard” — and the demo of the song was recorded in Anka’s studio in Carmel, CA. Anka says he took the tape to a studio in Hollywood to put the finishing touches on it for Anka’s duets album, “Walk a Fine Line.” Anka claims Jackson — who was just blowing up at the time with “Thriller” — got a big
Anka gave “I Never Heard” to another artist — Safire — who recorded it in 1990.
Jackson probably didn’t think he’d get into trouble because the song is absolutely god damn awful. Why the hell would anyone care? It would be like getting sued for sneaking into someones yard at night and stealing their dogshit. (hear Michaels version and the 1990 version below)
My Song - michael donnelly
The program made it clear that the funeral for Michael Jackson would begin promptly at 7, good news for people like 77-year-old Elizabeth Taylor as they waited around in the blazing California heat. Just 90 minutes later the Jackson family arrived and the service began. Gladys Knight sang the hymn, “Our Father” and Michaels three children placed a bejeweled crown on his golden casket, a crown that Joe would later spend the night digging up.
Al Sharpton was nice enough to update his twitter page during the event, a star-studded affair attended Elizabeth Taylor, Barry Bonds (really?), Macaulay Culkin, Mila Kunis, Chris Tucker, Corey Feldman and Lisa Marie Presley among others.
After the service friends and family gathered at a restaurant in Pasadena, where Feldman did a quick Michael Jackson impression as a tribute. He put on a white sheet and rattled some chains while saying “boo”. Seems inappropriate.
Michael Jackson died on June 25th, and it may seem odd that his family hasn’t buried him yet, but remember this: the Jacksons are a bunch of fucking retards.
But now, just 71 days after his death, MSNBC says today may be the day.
Michael Jackson’s burial will finally take place at Glendale Forest Lawn Memorial Park on Thursday. He’ll be laid to rest near many of his longtime heroes, such as Walt Disney and Nat King Cole.
Aside from immediate family, expect Jackson family confidants, such as Rev. Al Sharpton, to attend the 4 p.m. PT burial.
As for the ceremony itself, “it won’t be a religious one,” according to the family source. “The kids (Paris, Prince and Blanket) might say something, too, but the plan is to have (Jackson’s brother) Randy deliver the eulogy.”
The family has said it wants this to be a private event; however, sources close to the clan say to expect to see “private” portions surface on the A&E reality show about the Jackson brothers that is currently being taped.
Of course it’s gonna be filmed for a TV show. Why wouldn’t it be. What’s the point in burying someone if you can’t make any money off it? They probably had to wait so long to finish a Michael mannequin to go in the coffin, because Joe ground his bones into a powder months ago. He stirs it up as a drink and sells it to aspiring singers. If you want Joe to wear a big scary witch doctors mask while you stand in a circle of candles on the spot where Michael died as you drink it, that’s extra.
