Knock it off Katy Perry

By brendon July 01, 2009 @ 3:44 PM

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Look how hot Katy Perry can be when she’s mute and for 5 minutes stops dressing like a high school girl with a head injury.  Like in these pictures from Esquire magazine.  She’s pretty with a nice body and huge tits, but she insists on drowning all her hotness like it was a baby girl in China.  It’s like her plan is to not be sexy, but instead to be as annoying as possible as often as she can.  And so far, mission accomplished.

Amy Adams is better like this

By brendon June 29, 2009 @ 3:20 PM

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Amy Adams was the only recognizable name to show up in a bikini this weekend, and you may be wondering if she’s been hiding some amazing hot body all this time. Let me put it this way: No. See for yourself here and here. She can be cute sometimes, but in the wrong dress she’s like something you’d see haunting an Irish castle.

Thankfully someone reminded me about these Naomi Millbank Smith pictures.  Amys pictures had zero percent tits and pigment.  Naomis have about 400 percent.  She’s not really famous yet, but she’s filming her second movie now so maybe she will be soon.  Hopefully she will, because I’m sick of everyone we have now and I could get used to Naomis awesome chest.  I could post a new picture every day and never get bored.  Hell I could draw a new picture every day and never get bored.

7.1.09 UPDATE – amy adams pictures removed by request.

(26 more pics here. hq jump here)

Farrah Fawcett has (passed away)

By brendon June 25, 2009 @ 8:30 AM

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I naturally assume that everyone is still riding the high of LSU winning the College World Series last night, their sixth since 1991, so I’m sorry to drag everyone down, but late last night Farrah Fawcetts publicist made this statement:

It was just related to me, that our Farrah just given last rites. She is not in any pain. For those who believe make contact with god now.

That was on his Twitter page, and I’m no pc homo but I don’t think it would have killed him to change out his wildly, insanely inappropriate wallpaper before making a post about his client going to see God.  But whatever.  I thought a nice way to honor Farrah on what may be her final day would be to post a bunch of her Playboy pictures and then stare at her tits. You stay classy Brendon!

BREAKING CRAPPY UPDATE – at 9:37am pct, Entertainment Tonight issued an alert reporting that Farrah Fawcett died this morning at the age of 62.

(the pictures start here, and I should mention that they were surprisingly hard to find, so I tacked on Melanie Griffiths 1976 shoot when she was 19 – guest starring Don Johnson and Not Shaving – and Bo Dereks in 1980. I figure they’re all basically the same thing)

Denise Richards is lazy

By brendon June 24, 2009 @ 3:09 PM

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Denise Richards hit up the beaches in Hawaii again today, and again she dragged her dumb kids around and never took off her shorts. So if she’s not gonna bother to care about these pictures I’m not sure why the hell I would. Especially when last night was the 2009 Face of Origin pageant in England or maybe Australia. Oh I know. Can you believe it’s been a year already? Time sure does fly when you don’t know what the hell is going on. The big favorite of course was Rachel Burr, but could she live up to the hype and take the crown? The answer is a definitive, “yes presumably. If that is indeed her kissing the trophy. The caption wasn’t all that clear.”

(12 more pics here.  hq jump here.  source = getty and pacific coast)

Jewel is wasting this

By brendon June 22, 2009 @ 5:26 AM

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Jewel spent last week in the Bahamas with her husband the cowboy, and maybe it was all the kick-ass weed over there but she lightened the hell up just long enough to take a picture in a bikini (full size pic here) and then post it on twitter (here).

I’m sure someone like her finds it demeaning to get attention for her body because she’s such a class act, but if she insists on not going to the orthodontist she needs to do stuff like this. If you just saw her body you’d think you we’re looking at an ex-Playmate. If you just saw her teeth you’d think you we’re looking at something with paws and infested with ticks.

I hate mondays

By brendon June 21, 2009 @ 10:51 PM

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Shauna Sands areola look like they were taken off with a can opener, but please don’t think that would dissuade her in any way from showing her tits to strangers. Like she did Saturday in Miami. Unfortunately, if you take advantage of the fact that her tits look like surprised Garfield eyes, her tan lines mess it up and make him look sinister. I tried adding a pie because he’s fat, but he still looked like an evil villain.  After that I thought maybe lasagna would be better than pie, but then I realized I was way more concerned with making Shaunas tits appealing than Shauna was, and if she doesn’t care why the hell should I.

(10 topless pics here. hq jump here. source = splash news online)