Tom Cruise Introduced To Internet Porn By Seth Rogen

August 5, 2018 | celebrity | Elliot Wolf| 0 Comments

I wish a journalist was allowed to spend an entire 24 hours with Tom Cruise and then report back their findings. He seems like someone to keep their sanity together just long enough to not receive a handwritten invitation... READ MORE

Where To See Nudity From This Weekend’s Stars

July 27, 2018 | NSFW | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

  Mission: Impossible – Fallout is getting rave reviews across the board, which can only lead any sane person to assume that sucking reviewer dick is a possible mission for Tom Cruise. Honestly, who’s watching this shit? Anyway, this... READ MORE

Tom Cruise Tapping Into a Little Weinstein

October 13, 2017 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

When even dudes in Hollywood who don't even like women are hooking up young chicks with jobs and suddenly "seeing them" in private, maybe this town does have a problem.



Tom Cruise Isn’t Checking In With Suri Very Often

September 19, 2017 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

A new report in InTouch Weekly claims Tom Cruise hasn't seen his daughter Suri in the past four years. Or about since that time he sued the shit out of  Life and Style magazine for claiming he had abandoned... READ MORE

Tom Cruise Stunt Queen

August 14, 2017 | celebrity | Sam Robeson| 0 Comments

In these time - aka all times - we rely on celebs to bring the yucks, and nobody is yuckier than Tom Cruise injuring himself on set while filming Mission Impossible Thirty: Safely Crossing The Road. Cruise's mission... READ MORE

Top Gun 2 Is On Like Donkey Kong

May 24, 2017 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Top Gun was a testimony to how films in the 80's sucked yet were commercially successful. Exactly like every other decade. Only the 80's movies were saturated with the Glenn Frey and Kenny Loggins anthems. So worse. 


Tom Cruise Not Even Well Liked Within Scientology

November 30, 2016 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Leah Remini is hosting a tell-all documentary series on A&E about Scientology. It's a career move for those who'd like to wonder about the headlights in the rear view mirror for the rest of their lives. READ MORE

Tom Cruise Working Something Big

April 12, 2016 | celebrity | Lex Jurgen| 0 Comments

Tom Cruise has received permission from the partially ethereal leaders of the Church of Scientology to move into L. Ron Hubbard’s old castle digs in England and spruce it up a bit. The former Hubbard home before he headed... READ MORE

Tom Cruise Persona Non Grata

July 21, 2015 | Uncategorized | matt-ralston| 0 Comments

Persistent rumors indicate Tom Cruise is thinking about leaving the Church of Scientology, at which point we can stop discussing whether or not he is gay because they will purchase a two hour block of prime time to air his... READ MORE

Tom Cruise Is Missing And Shit Around The Web

April 7, 2015 | crap around the web | editor| 0 Comments

Reports coming out of dead-eyed Katie Holmes’ camp claim that demented dwarf Tom Cruise hasn’t seen his daughter Suri in over a year. Since he owns his own plane, a couple helicopters, and four rickshaw boys from the Canton... READ MORE