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Hey everyone, look at Miley Cyrus being nonchalant and edgy again! She wants everyone to see this bruise on her ass, but people are going to lose their shit, y’all, when they realize that her finger is touching her... READ MORE

I guess I’m old. I remember when you used to go to a restaurant for some chow and then you thanked your server with a tip and left. There were few lingering emotional connections, just a fucking burger and... READ MORE

I don’t understand Dancing with the Stars. Who are the stars? The hard looking Crimean immigrant dancers? The slag of former childhood stars, retired athletes, and Teen Beat covers from the 80’s they dope up and dress in sequins... READ MORE

There’s nothing worse than when somebody takes a stunt too far. Like when you agree to lay on the golf course and have a tee and ball placed in your bare ass cheeks for cash, like many women do... READ MORE

There’s a place in Utah I think, maybe it moved since last I checked. It makes all the celebrity perfumes. They send the celebrity team a list of a few artificial smell ingredients they can check off to personalize... READ MORE

You’ll occasionally see a brainy NFL player. They’re the guys tearfully quitting the game early because they’ve just read studies on long term concussive injuries. Once in a while, you’ll encounter a smart gang member. They’re always getting themselves... READ MORE

Lesbian lesser born hobbit Justin Bieber is trying to make a plea deal with his neighbor’s lawyers over the infamous egging incident. The LA County DA asked to meet with Bieber’s undead lawyer Howard Weitzman to discuss the deal.... READ MORE

Kardashian matriarch and all around horrible person Kris Jenner is being stalked and extorted over a possible sex tape. It seems like some creeper claims he has a sex tape of the reality “star” and is threatening to release... READ MORE

I’m not certain the world needs another teen heartthrobs Hunger Games type book series for kids too illiterate to read real science fiction. Any time a story synopsis leads with ‘Set in a dystopian future…’ it’s going to be... READ MORE