Rihanna just fired Jay Z

By brendon September 01, 2011 @ 12:57 PM


Media Take Out, which I think of as the black TMZ because I’m racist, says today that things are about to get very ugly and very public between Rihanna and Jay Z, because she’s about to fire his RocNation management firm, then sue them.

She reportedly first considered this back in April because she felt they were favoring Beyonce–who is married to Jay Z–when it came to endorsement deals and song writers, and because she felt they were forcing too many other RocNation clients on to her to get them exposure. She then reconsidered, but the announcement of Beyonces pregnancy has seemingly changed her mind again, and now MTO says…

Her first step in breaking free – Rihanna has launched a MULTI-MILLION DOLLAR LAWSUIT against her “official” RocNation manager, Jay Brown’s sister.
Rihanna claims that Jay’s sister DEFRAUDED her.

I’m in LA for a few days and I forgot how many God damn billboards they have for movies and TV shows. They’re everywhere. You can’t go 30 seconds without seeing one, which is annoying because every non-Mexican in this town is here to work in movies and TV. We get it, ok. Everyone knows about ‘Drive’ and ‘Whitney‘ and all that other shit so stop already with the endless billboards. What do you want from me, I can only watch one thing at a time, I’m not gonna bring a TV to the movies if that’s what you’re hinting at. And yeah I realize this has nothing to do with Rihanna, but that story was about Jay Z being a criminal. Oohh, gee you don’t say. I haven’t seen all the facts yet but yeah he did it, he’s guilty. I don’t know what he’s guilty of exactly but I’m sure it’s somethin.

(image source = wenn)

Marc Anthony says he didnt cheat on Henifaa Yopez

By brendon September 01, 2011 @ 11:24 AM


From the moment that Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony announced that they were ending their 7 year marriage, there have been rumors that it was because Anthony was cheating. Most notably with Jada Pinkett, which reportedly ended her marriage to Will Smith. This all seems reasonable because Jennifer Lopez is a mean bitch and everyone hates her, but he tells ABC News the real reason for the divorce was way less interesting.

“I’ll tell you that it wasn’t something sensationalistic happening,” Anthony said.
Although tabloids claimed that he broke up their 7-year-old marriage with affairs, Anthony says, “absolutely not.” The reason for their break-up, he says, was much simpler. Their marriage just no longer “worked.”
“It was a realization on both our parts. So you know it wasn’t shocking. These things happen,” he said. ”It was a decision that we made jointly.”
“This is not a funeral. this is not a burial. This is just two people who came together and just realized — and so I’m saying that it wasn’t sustainable the way it was, and that’s that.”

Interesting choice of words, because there would very definitely have been a funeral and a burial if I were married to that cunt for 7 years. At the very least I’d cheat on her constantly just to stay sane. I’d go to Puerto Rico or wherever it is she’s from and get a new prostitute with a big ass every night and call her Jennifer and choke the hell out of her.

Oh crap, is this being published? I should probably re-write that last part.

Alyssa Milano looks different

By brendon August 31, 2011 @ 2:57 PM


Alyssa Milano went to a spa in LA earlier today, probably because she needed a massage from carrying around what looks to be a 6 foot tall baby. She announced she was pregnant at the end of February, so she’s probably due any day, but holy christ. Her vagina is gonna look like someone set off M-80′s inside of it.

(image source = pacific coast)

seriously, fuck you George Lucas

By brendon August 31, 2011 @ 2:40 PM

In what may be the best argument ever for illegally downloading movies, George Lucas is finally releasing all 6 Star Wars titles on blu-ray, because there’s still a few dollars for him to steal from his fans. And of course because he has no idea what he’s doing or what made the movies good to begin with, he’s also “updated” some of the scenes.

As aintitcool, via badass digest, says…

this is confirmed… yes, Vader says “No!” as he picks the Emperor up.  This is yet another change in the Original Trilogy.
It was already such a perfect moment.  As Luke, dying under the Emperor’s torrent of force lightning, calls out to his father to help him, Vader stares quietly, looks at his son, then at the Emperor, and makes his decision.  And he DOESN”T FUCKING SAY A THING.  That’s what makes it so powerful.  You could almost see the thought process behind the mask, as Vader slowly comes out of the fog of 20+ years of evil.  It’s a grand, amazing moment and the pinnacle of the trilogy, in my opinion.
And George Lucas just ruined it.

Very obviously George Lucas is a complete moron who simply lucked his way into this franchise because there were talented people around him and everything good about the first two movies were someone else’s idea that he hated but the studio made him use. I’m amazed we even still have James Earl Jones on here, and that Lucas didn’t replace him with Eddie Griffin or someone like that, so Darth Vader can say things like, “where my big girls girls at?”

Britney Spears wants more litt’lins

By brendon August 31, 2011 @ 1:34 PM


As far as I know, the British tabloids have never been wrong about anything, certainly not when it comes to celebrity gossip, so when the Sun says Britney Spears has convinced her fiance that they should start a family, you can take it to the bank. She’s probably in labor as we speak.

The couple have been having several talks about their future recently and decided they would be keen to start a family once Britney’s gigs are wrapped up at the end of the year.
A source said: “She’s always wanted a big family but also wants to prove to herself and to her family she is a good mother. She wants another chance to put things right.
“Now she’s finally had the green light from Jason, she can’t wait.”

I bet the only ones against this would be her current two kids. Because the new kid is gonna have a dad who is smart, handsome, and accomplished, while their dad is fat titted jackass. If there was a way to gamble on “guy who will have a girl cut off his dick next”, I would put a million dollars on KFed.

thank God for Rose McGowan

By brendon August 31, 2011 @ 12:06 PM


Rose McGowan looked terrific as she left a hair salon in LA yesterday, and by that I mean she somehow pushed her big tits into a shirt made for a toddler. In fact her entire outfit was nice. It’s like a classy version of a Hooters waitress.

(image source = splash and pacific coast)

its Superman. and his penis.

By brendon August 31, 2011 @ 10:59 AM


The Superman reboot ‘Man of Steel’ filmed some more scenes yesterday with Plano, Illinois, filling in for Smallville, and, um, here are some pictures of Henry Cavill in the new, very very tight Superman costume. It’s as if they skipped ahead and just made the porn parody first. So on top of all the action, this looks like it should be a good date movie too, especially if you and your date are both men.

(image source = wenn, facebook)

Kim Kardashian has a new video

By brendon August 30, 2011 @ 6:19 PM

The record no one has been waiting for, the debut from Kim Kardashian, is finally on its way and now there’s even a preview of her first video for the single ‘Jam (Turn It Up)’. In the video Kim crawls around on her hands and knees and sweats like an Alabama mule, then says she’s goin out tonight because it’s Friday, Friday, gotta get down on Friday.