Lena Dunham Leaving If Hillary Doesn't Take Over

Lena Dunham known for her fierce feminism and the constant smell of wet woodland mammal that follows her like a Pig-Pen dirt cloud is ditching the United State if Donald Trump beats Hillary Clinton in November. Unlike previous celebrities who have said unlike previous celebrities they are truly serious about leaving, Dunham stated that she is truly serious about leaving unlike previous celebrities. Dunham posted this...read more

Michelle Fields Brutalized

Breitbart reporter Michelle Fields has big hair and big tits and employsboth as tools in her journalist tool box. She's composed like a beauty pageant runner up. The one who pounds apple-tinis while bitching about Miss Costa Rica really being from Lauderdale.Fields claims that Donald Trump's campaign managerCorey Lewandowski grabbed her forcefully as he tried to prevent her from asking Trump a question on the campaign...read more

Trump v. Pope

Donald Trump has attacked Pope Francis because Francis is blatant front runner who during a speech in Southern MexicomockedTrump's Great Wall of Mexico plan. Trump loves that wall even more than he loves his own children, save for Ivanka who he always refers to in a creepy incestuous manner. The Pope spoke in Spanish, one of the seventeen languages he can mutter semi-intelligibly, soit's possible something was lost in...read more

The Thought of Hillary Clinton Peeing Disgusts Conservatives (VIDEO)

Either you believe Donald Trump is a blowhard who you'd routinely punch in the gunt if he didn't have security or he's an incredibly honed in wordsmith who uses the subtleties of language to lure in voters. Trump's been hitting the public fora recasting in people's minds the moment in the Saturday evening Democratic Party debate when Hillary Clinton returned late from a toilet break and the ABC broadcast started up...read more

Larry David Gets Paid And Shit Around The Web

On last Saturday's SNL, Larry David called Donald Trump a racist to his face. Though it was part of a bit, David is now entitled to a $5000 bounty a pro-immigration group offered to anyone in the SNL audience that would do the same.Five grant isa shitload of illegal roach coach tacos, my amigo. Watch what all the hoopla is about. (TMZ) Olivia Culpo bikinis with the best of them. (Last Men On Earth) Sarah Hay and some...read more

Trump Takes on Facebook

Donald Trump takes on the big names. Occasionally, illegal immigrant ice cream cart vendorsand masa kneading abuelitas, but at times, direct for the gullet of the rich and powerful in his own class. Trump's latest Tourette's like outburstwas targeted at Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg who is widelyadmireddespite being the world's largest Bond villaingatherer of private information and also a nipple fearing spastic...read more

Period Shaming Is Tampon Shaming With a Twist

Donald Trump is a distasteful narcissist. He's not a retard. Nobody makes period jokes about women on national television. Trump's comment on CNN regarding Megyn Kelly at the Fox News debate, You could see there was blood coming out of her eyes. Blood coming out of her wherever... was immediately picked up by the 75%of GOP who hate Trump, 100% of Democrats, and all lazy journalists who no longer want to work for...read more

Trump Wins Before It Starts

I'm not watching a Republican Presidential Debate because a week of afternoon television for fat women has taught me to love myself more than that. I'll boldly predict Donald Trump the winner over the other nine guys who you'd never pick to be on your dodgeball team even after you were left with only the scoliosis kids. The Trump phenomenon is easy to explain. He's got himself into Special Ed and he's able to spell...read more

Donald Trump Breast Pump Shaming

Donald Trump berated a lawyer who was deposing him because she needed to pump breast milk for her baby, according to the lawyer and to Trump. Elizabeth Beck eventually came down on the losing side in the case, possibly becauseshe brought her baby to the office and was tickling it while pretending to listen to the proceedings. At some point Beck asked for a one hour break so she could pump the milk, a standard...read more

Donald Trump Signs Off

Donald Trump appears to have lost the sane vote, the Latino vote, the self respecting vote, the moderate vote, the reader vote, and the voter vote. He now appears to have alienated the entire Republican party after making fun of John McCain because he spent six years in a POW camp. That should go over swimmingly atthe Elk's Lodge: "He's not a war hero.He was a war hero because he was captured. I like people who...read more

Mexican Drug Lord Calls Trump a Faggot

Sinaloa drug cartel little jefe El Chapo escaped once again from prison in Mexico. Escaped seems like an overstatement since the Mexican army corps of engineers dug him a mile-longindustrial grade tunnel to leisurely walkhim away from the facility.The second thing El Chapo did after fucking tons of chicks and drinking tequila through the nostrils of his decapitated enemies was to Tweet Donald Trump and call him a...read more

The Donald Dropped By Macy's

Donald Trump fired back at Macy's after they dropped his clothing linebecause ofhis couple or three racist comments about Mexicans. It turns out you can't even be president if the Latinos are indifferent towards you, let alone when your campaign consists mostly of picking on the bus boys. Macy's issued a statement generally calling Trump an idiot and reminding customers of their upcoming Dia de la Raza Sale. Trump...read more

Trump Loses Chilean Hunk

The uncomfortably handsome Chilean actor set to host Donald Trump's owned Miss USA pageant has pulled out because Trump called Mexican immigrants murderous raping drug dealers who smell like bad tacos.Cristian de la Fuente even made a selfie video of his disdain for Trump, because that's what you do when you're angry and canmake women cum with just your three-day facial hair. Mr. Trump, as a Latino, I cannot work in...read more

Donald Trump Gets El Dumpoed And Shit Around The Web

Presidential candidate and dead ferret toupee wearer Donald Trump has really pissed off the Mexicans. Univision has dropped Trump's Miss USA Pageant after Trump called Mexican immigrants rapists and thieves. Pobrecito. Read all about how Donald got himself in agua caliente with Univision. (TMZ) Kylie Jenner wears a see-through outfit. Surprised? (Egotastic) Skreech gets sentenced to four months in jail for shanking a...read more

Donald Trump Is Justice

Even though the Central Park Five have been cleared of all charges, Donald Trump is pissed they reached a financial settlement after each spent up to 13 years in prison. The forty million dollar settlement means each wrongly accused man receives eight million. I did the math and eight million bucks divided by 13 years is 70 bucks an hour. That's more than I make but I wouldn't trade my desk job for ass rapes, prison...read more